mental health monday: i miss my friend.

The last two weeks have been hard. I miss my friend Liz. It has started to sink in that she is really gone. Her energy is still here with me though. I can feel her hand on my shoulder, reassuring me that I will be okay, that I am doing the right thing. While my heart is heavy for many reasons, I do feel a certain peace and acceptance about where things are at. The beauty of Liz was how much she loved her friends and accepted them for who they were and what they were able to give. She showed up for the important things. She lived every day. She continues to inspire me.

top 10 valentine's gifts for her.

Okay fellas, you have just over a week left to get your ass in gear for Valentine's Day.  If you are like any of the men I know, you have know clue what to get your lady.  I'm going to help you out with my top ten favourite things (excluding flowers).  I'm not even being paid to write this.  Consider it a "how to make sure you get some action" public service announcement (cue Barry White).

In no particular order:


Flowerbomb by Viktor & Rolf - recommended by my girl Lulu


There is a very nice flowery description about this perfume on the Sephora site that you can take a boo at.   The real deal here is that you will look très sophisticated and in the know if you get this perfume for your lady.  I would also like this, and even though I'm not your lady, feel free to also send me some.  Unless that would get you in a lot of trouble.  I'm not about breaking up relationships.

Pink Starburst Market Tote by Gussy Sews

I met Gussy last week at the Blissdom conference in Nashville.  She is a wonderfully talented designer who creates everything from wallets to laptop bags (all made in America).  I have actually ordered this particular bag for myself (a Valentine's gift for me from me!).  If you haven't noticed already, I am a big fan of pink.  Not to worry, Gussy offers her products in all sorts of colours, so she will definitely have something your lady will like in her favourite colour.

Lovebirds t-shirt by Threadless


Maybe your lady is nontraditional (I totally get that).  If you don't know about Threadless, you need to go check them out.  This t-shirt is funky and unique and also draws attention to the bust (a good thing in my books).

pearl bracelet with a charm from the vintage pearl

I would jump and down and kiss anyone who got this for me.  Really, give it a try, you will get a big smooch from yours truly.  I have a necklace from the vintage pearl that I wear on a daily basis.  What I love about their jewelry is it is reasonably priced, very hip, and you personalize it which will make you look really thoughtful (you don't have to tell your lady that you got the idea from me).

Globe Salt Lamp from Hima Salt

This suggestion is a bit out there, but maybe your lady is too, so this will be just the thing for her.  I have given several salt lamps as gifts and they were all very well received.  They are said to be good for natural healing and light therapy.  I have one in my bedroom next to my Buddha and I find it very relaxing.  They come in all sorts of shapes and sizes.  I got mine at my local health food store.  Note, they are very heavy, so if your lady tends to be one who throws things when she gets upset, this may not be a great idea for you.

The Beauty of Different by Karen Walrond

This is also a nontraditional gift idea, but if your lady is a book lover, this may be just the ticket.  It is a book about beauty in all dimensions.  I dare you to not feel warm and fuzzy after reading this book.  The writing is inspiring and the photographs are breathtaking and it is all about embracing yourself and those around you and loving the things that makes us all different.  I read a few pages every day and it lifts my spirits every time.

open circle necklace by lisa leonard designs


Can you tell I love me some jewellery? I have several Lisa Leonard pieces that I absolutely cherish.  I don't have this one (yet), but honestly, I would have a hard time choosing just one piece from her collection (check out her site and you will see what I mean).  You can personalize most pieces (more thoughtful points!!) and if your lady doesn't love this, then maybe you should find another lady (I'm just sayin' is all).

Oyster Bay Sauvingon Blanc

I adore this wine.  If your lady is a white wine drinker, it is a safe bet she will enjoy this.  It's not super cheap, but not so expensive that you feel like every sip should taste like liquid gold (whatever liquid  gold tastes like).  I also recommend ordering in Thai food to have with this.  Especially if your lady likes Thai food!  And get a movie while you are at it! And candles! Yes, candles for sure!!

Aveda spa day

I am a sucker for Aveda products.  I am also a big fan of going to the spa (for the entire day if you're offering thanks).  An Aveda spa day would blow my mind.  It will blow your lady's mind.  It may be pricey but I'm willing to bet you will feel like it was worth every penny for the good will you get back.  She'll be happy and pampered and relaxed and feel like a million bucks.  A happy lady is a good thing.

Year of Godiva Dark Chocolate

Of course, it's Valentine's Day, so there must be chocolate (and dark chocolate is really good for you, so you are also being health conscious).  But don't half ass it with a heart shaped box of drugstore chocolate - do it up right.  I'm talking Godiva, and I'm talking the gift that keeps on giving.  Imagine this - every month your lady gets chocolate and you get to reap the benefits of her post chocolate bliss - and all you had to do was make one simple investment.  Sounds ideal.  Sounds like something you should do.  And if my husband is reading this, I would love something (exactly) like this.

Did I miss anything? Ladies, do you have any other suggestions?  Do tell!

live long and prosper: part three.

This is where things start to get fuzzy for me. Did I mention that our table polished off more wine during dinner than the rest of the guests combined?  I'm pretty sure at some point we got cut off, but it wasn't until after we were all feeling mighty tipsy. 

According to the sequence I took photos in, the next thing that happened was that Cathy got up and made a lovely speech about how she met Gordon.  I believe it involved a work function, and his friends scoping her out for months in advance, and that when he finally asked her to go out with him, she said something to the effect of "sure, you can get my email address of the company website".  Cold.  But hey, it all worked out.

And then, there was dancing.  Heather and I were finally reunited and I took a picture of us...well, most of us - somehow I didn't make it all the way into the shot.

At this point, I think I was rather intoxicated.  That's my excuse anyway.  Cathy was on the phone with someone who probably wasn't at the wedding, and I took advantage of the situation by grabbing her boobs.  I'm happy to report that they are 100% real.  And they're spectacular.

I proceeded to make an ass of myself with assorted friends and strangers.  Here you see me and Anita.

Me with Gordon's dad and little brother (still drunk):

And finally, the couple had their first dance.  It didn't last long.

Instead of treating us to a waltz, they broke out their lightsabres and had a duel. The question is, who represents Luke Skywalker and who represents Darth Vader?

Everybody together now: "NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS!"

Cathy, clearly the winner of the lightsabre duel, celebrated her dominance over Gordon by getting down.

Not one to let our friend dance alone, we all joined in.  That's Steve, doing the "white man shuffle".

Sarah, me and Cathy shaking our money makers.

Anita and Tanya making a Cathy sandwich.

Gordon enjoyed himself and Cathy indulged him. Hope he doesn't get used to that.

I believe at this point, everyone was in a circle kicking their legs up and singing a song that included the lyric "time of our lives....".  No idea what the song was but man that was fun.

Heather, Matt, Jen and Will staying close to the "refreshments".  I love men in purple.  Hot.

More dancing.  I believe Cathy is wisely drinking water.  Smart bride!  Look at Gordon's smooth moves.

I don't know this guy's name, but I believe that move was retired when we were all teenagers.

Same with this guy.  No comment on his boogy down style. He was having a good time, and what else really matters?

And then, the part of the evening I had been waiting for....the cake! Cathy TOTALLY smushed it on Gordon's nose.  Gordon, (wisely), did not reciprocate.  But somehow, cake did end up on Cathy's dress.  Bound to happen when you wear white from top to bottom, eh? 

Sadly, this is where the pictures ended.  As Scott put it, after I finished my cake, "I slunk the f*ck out".  He found me mere minutes later, asleep (passed out) in our bed.  This did not stop him from inviting everyone back to our room to continue partying.  Alas, nobody took him up on it and he fell asleep in his underwear on the love seat, flat on his back with his feet resting on the window air conditioning unit.  A sign that a good time was had by all for sure.

Part 4 - the morning after...to come! With video! 

live long and prosper: part two.

The wedding march really speaks for itself.  All kinds of awesome.  To fully understand just how nerdy Gordon is, you need to read the engagement story on Cathy's blog.

But Cathy really was a beautiful bride, so let's ooh and aah at her as she walks down the aisle with her folks.

The officiant was certainly a fun lady...uh...not much more to say on that front...Gordon's little brother (aka "Little G") was the best man and Cathy's sister Jen was the maid of honour.  

As you can see from Gordon's jacket, it was a windy day.  Actually, it rained all afternoon, so they were blessed by mother nature that the weather cleared up so they could have their wedding outside.

Comments from the peanut gallery distracting Gordon (who am I kidding, it was probably Scott).

The ceremony was short and sweet and full of love and gooeyness, just as it should be.

Then they signed the paperwork and made it all legit.  There was a lot of standing and picture taking.  A lot.

Hips don't lie.  Gordon's a LUCKY guy.

While the wedding party and family took pictures, we all trekked back to room eleven (Scott and my room) to get our drink on.  Can you tell Stephanie isn't wearing a slip?  I know, I'm scandalized too.

Craig and Raye look pretty good when they're sober.  And I'm a decent photographer when I'm sober too.  You'll notice that the pictures get fuzzier as the evening goes on.

Scott and Shane (friends since they were in grade school).  The only reason they see each other now is because Stephanie and I are friends.  It's always the ladies who hold these friendships together I tell ya!

Me and Shane, who look like we are the parents of his kids and Max.  That's the joke anyway.  Absolutely zero truth to it, but it's fun to kid about.

The real photographer Anita and her hubby Gregor.  Funny enough, Anita is the one who introduced Scott and me way back when, and she is the ever patient photographer who has shot our Christmas cards for the past 4 years.

The buxom and beautiful Tanya - this one's for you Dave! Wish you had been here!

Never met this fella in my life, but his name is Mike and he has a talent for growing mad cool facial hair.  The lady on the right is Laura.  No idea how I even remember that.

All the tables were named after planets from the Star Wars universe.  NERDS!

I wanted to get another picture of Tanya from an aerial view.  Scott jumped into the frame.  I was making a total ass of myself by standing on my chair in the middle of the dining room.

While I was up there I snapped a pic of Shane, Josh and Theresa.  Josh clearly thinks I'm super entertaining (or nuts).

That's Sarah in the background, and Heather, smiling at me.  I caught her trying to take a picture of me so I took one of her first.  Heather was married on the same day as Scott and me.  Cathy went to her wedding instead of ours.  I'm not bitter.

The speeches were funny and sincere and full of inside and outside jokes.  What I'll say about Cathy's family is that I have known most of them as long as I've known Cathy because they are a really big part of her life.  The phrase "salt of the earth" comes to mind, and isn't even cliche in this instance.  Also, Cathy's mom is a stone cold fox.

Adding to the nerdiness, there was a vulcan salute en mass.  I may have participated (mob behaviour).

The ladies escaped to the restroom to pee and talk and be silly.  Something about multiple toilets in one room makes girls bond.  No idea why that is, but it seems consistent no matter where or who I'm with.  

Evelyn, Stephanie, Theresa, and moi.

Of course there was dancing.  But the party really deserves it's own post, so you gotta wait!  

Part 3 tomorrow!!