Thursday, August 10, 2006

Holy sh!t I'm hella tired.

All those obnoxious people who said "enjoy your sleep now cuz you won't be getting any once your baby comes" can bite me. Because really, it's not like you can store up on sleep in advance. It's like they are smirking at your impending exhaustion. Kind of like when someone else falls down the stairs...hilarious. Not that I would change a thing, I still love the little guy, love being a mom, love the smiles, gurgles and all that. But I also miss having time to rub moisturizer on my hands, the desire to shave my legs, having enough brainpower to read a book or remember what exactly I was trying to say. Mommy brain is a definite reality. The other day I tried to use the debit card of a bank account I closed 6 months ago. I went to the store to buy some bread and came home with chips. Sigh. Good times.Max is thriving, he really couldn't be doing better. He is smiling and laughing, holding his head up when he lays on his stomach, and wow is he ever vocal. This kid can talk and talk and talk. No idea what he is saying...but boy can this kid tell stories. The sleeping thing seems to be hit and miss. A few nights ago he slept 7 hours straight. I proceeded to jinx it by emailing my entire family to tell them. The next night he was up every 3 hours. The next night, same deal. Argh. Thing is, even when he sleeps 7 hours, when he only does it once in a while, I wake up every hour to check and make sure he is okay. At least I know he can do it...one day he will do it more often than once in a blue moon.I have started to check out daycares for when I need to go back to work next year. I actually feel ill at the thought of someone else taking care of Max. I have found a good daycare and got Max on the waiting list. Now I just have to reconcile myself with it. And enjoy every minute I get with the little guy. He's just growing too fast.

8 comments:

  1. Obviously, i understand. My kids woke up every two hours for two years each. I have no brain.

    Nap, nap, nap. Embrace the nap - everything else can wait till next year.

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  2. Max is looking more and more adorable every day! And huge... Wow! Great job.

    Sleep becomes a bit of an enigma once you have kids. Even when Charlotte started sleeping through the night, I didn't. I kept myself half awake all night for almost a year listening intently to the monitor for signs of her stirring. It made no logical sense, really. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture and I'm not sure anyone else undertands that as much as new mothers. All I can say is, "I'm sorry". It does get better eventually, not that that helps you deal with today any easier. Just know that you're not alone and that you always have other Mom's to call on for help. Take care of yourself Momma!

    p.s. Tree is trying Sleep Training and she says it seems to be working. You never know!

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  3. Thanks for the support ladies. It means a lot to hear that I am not alone and that my experience is not unique.

    As if to mock me, Max slept last night from 12:30am - 10:30am, 10 hours straight! I had to wake him up to feed him because I thought I was going to explode. What a kid. I hope I get more nights like this in the future.

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  4. Anonymous4:28 PM

    Wow - I don't blame you for having mommy brain one bit - or complaining about sleep deprivation. No one knows how hard it is until they've walked in your shoes.

    I haven't even given birth yet (5 more months - eeks!) and I can't stand the thought of leaving my baby in a daycare. The realities of work suck. Why can't we all win lotteries?

    And Max looks gorgeous, as always!

    Holly.

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  5. holy cow, max is cute!

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  6. aww it's the Maxilicious one. He is adorable. Hey I hear you on the baby brain thing and I haven't even had mine yet (39 more days - eek !) I left my keys at a restaurant the other day that I didn't even drive to. Not only that but walking up the stairs has turned into an exhausting task. I'm falling apart ! lol

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  7. Max is Mr. Shirtless, isn't he! It looks good on him. Meanwhile, we're engendering a deep-seated sense of shame and other body-centric problems into Leithy by nearly never letting him lounge around with just his loincloth (er, loinplastic) on. At this rate, one day he will grow up to become the Onesie Ambassador to the United Nations.

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  8. What are y'all feeding him? You would think he was an American baby!

    I love polar bears. That was one cute pitcha.

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