12 weeks already?

Where does the time go? Seriously, I feel like I blinked and this 7lb baby I brought home from the hospital suddenly turned into a 15lb little boy that could hide a family of four in his leg chubs. My gawd this kid is huge. Good huge, I mean he is 100% breastfed and given the rough start we had in that department, I take a certain amount of pride in the fact that he is clearly thriving.



This week was a tough one for me emotionally. We took Max to Sick Kids Hospital to get him checked out as he has a few issues with his "plumbing". He is fine, but he may need some surgery on his right kidney as he has what appears to be a double system where a second ureter (you are only supposed to have one on each side) is going from the top part of his right kidney down to his bladder. This second ureter is blocked and swollen, so urine is backing up from his bladder into his kidney. Not good. So we are going back in a few weeks for some more tests. He has to be on antibiotics to keep him from getting a urinary tract infection. Sigh. I don't think I realized how stressed out I was about the whole thing until after we got home from the hospital. I had zero energy. We had popcorn and pogo sticks for dinner. I will say that the staff at Sick Kids are awesome. They know how to take care of babies there for sure and we are lucky to live so close to one of the best hospitals for kids in the world. I bought Max a Grover doll in the gift shop. I think it was probably more retail therapy for me than anything else, though he does think he is pretty interesting to look at.

We also had a very full social calendar this week. Another playdate with Max's BGF (best girlfriend) Maya, a visit from our friend Cathy, dinner at Scott's folks' place, and we dropped by the Nelmans in Burlington so that all the boys could pass Max around and marvel at what a little bruiser he is. Today we are just chilling out. Max is asleep in his little chair, looking like an angel baby. He is still sleeping 6-7 hours straight each night, though now that he has outgrown his bassinet he doesn't like sleeping in his Pack 'n Play. So, he is in bed with us which is fine. I mean, he's growing so fast, I don't want to miss a minute, even when we are sleeping.

The Goddess of Sleep.

Max slept for 7 hours straight last night in his bassinet. It would have been great, except I am not used to him sleeping for that long so I woke up every hour, and neither are my breasts which were bursting at the seams to feed the little Lumpkin. Not that I'm going to look a gift horse in the mouth, I mean, I am LOVING the fact that Max is starting to sleep longer. I just need to get used to it. I'm sure that will be no problem. I think that Max might have been inspired by the new Tamara de Lempicka print hanging above our bed. I have loved "Dormeuse" for years (even since I saw it hanging in the window of a store on King Street). When Scott asked me what I wanted for my birthday this year, this is what I asked for. We actually ordered the print while I was still preggo, so the frame shop owner was quite pleased to meet Max when we finally got off our butts to go pick it up on Friday.
In other Max news, he spent less than a week in size 2 diapers and has now graduated to size 3 diapers. Yes, this boy is a monster baby. I stupidly assumed that he would still be in size 2 diapers, say, next week, so I bought another bag on Friday. After a huge poo-cano that got all over me (gross!) last night it was determined that they no longer fit. Sigh. So off to Dominion I went on a Saturday night to buy diapers. Just diapers. And the kid at the cash register called me "Ma'am" and I couldn't even get mad about it. I mean shit, I was buying diapers. On a Saturday night. That is textbook "Ma'am" behaviour if you ask me.

A Week in Pictures.

Solitaire was saying that she hadn't seen a picture of Max smiling yet. It isn't that he doesn't smile, he smiles a lot, but he gets very serious when he sees the camera. I managed to snap this pic earlier in the week. It is a bit out of focus so we will keep trying.
Max had another playdate with his girlfriend Maya this week. Scott loves this pic because Max looks so suspicious of the proceedings. He's looking at Jen like "Lady, WHAT is going on here?".
Canada day started out with Scott and Max sleeping in and Mom taking advantage of this by sneaking out bed for some tea. I couldn't resist getting a pic of my two dudes in bed.
Later on Canada Day Max and I had a nap. Apparently Scott found us equally irrisistable. We were late to his folks' place because he couldn't bear to wake us up.
This is Max in his super cute Baby Gap outfit that his Uncle Dan bought him. See, it's a good thing Max has family and friends that will buy him all of these super cute clothes. His mom and dad are too cheap to spend that kind of cash on something he'll wear for a total of 2 months.








On Sunday we went out to Aurora to visit Stephanie, Shane and Charlotte. They hadn't seen Max since he was a week old and they could not believe how big he is now. Charlotte is pretty much the cutest little girl ever. She is very ladylike (crosses her legs, eats very delicately). She also has an eye for Scott which is super cute as she was very interested in keeping track of what he was up to at all times.
Last but not least, Max has finally taken to his swing. He didn't like it too much in previous weeks, but now he thinks it is okay. I love how he has his toes all spread out. We had to take him out after about twenty minutes because he got mad that he could not reach the bears so he could eat them.

Keep your eyes peeled for my first non-baby related blog in...forever. Rockstar Supernova starts tomorrow and you know I'm going to be watching that trainwreck.

Future Bball Player?

Since Max was born after the regular NBA season ended, he did not have to endure the torture of yet another underwhelming season of Raptors basketball. We are hoping that he will bear witness to a new, improved, era of basketball under the realm of Brian Colangelo. In celebration of the Rap's #1 pic, Max has gotten into Raptor gear and is sure to be an exciting night of liveblogging in the RaptorBlog household.

If you are wondering about Max's stats, he is weighing in at a whopping 13 pounds at only 2 months (75th percentile) and measuring at 24.25 inches in height (95th percentile!). His wingspan needs some work as it is only 23 inches, but babies have short arms, so he has some time. At his 2 month checkup his doctor asked me if I was giving him any formula (inferring that his 4 pound weight gain and 3 inches in growth in the past month might be from overeating). I told him "Nope, he is 100% breastfed". Apparently my milk is powerful like rocket fuel.
So, if you haven't already seen this baby, as our friend Lulu (of the famed "Lulu and Chris" says, you best "invite yourself over ASAP". He is growing by the minute!

Maxwell Hunter: 2 months old.

My dearest baby Max, you are 2 months old today. My gawd, where has the time gone? I told your dad that I am the happiest that I have been in my life right now, being your mommy. I have the best job in the world getting to take care of you. That brought tears to his eyes because it so important to him that he is doing a good job taking care of us (and he is). You have an "official" nickname (selected by the good readers of Fickle Feline). You will now be known as "Lumpkin". We are working on a t-shirt for you to commemorate this. Just so you know, your Grandma gave you that name. We will still sometimes refer to you by your other names (how can we not call you "Porkchop" with the baby chubs you are developing?).

You have your 2 month checkup doctor's appointment Monday and I am pretty sure you will be tipping the scales at least 13 pounds. I'm not sure how long you are, but I'm guessing 24 inches. I do believe this will place you in the 90+ percentile, so you are one big boy. We won't get too fixated on the numbers though, bottom line is you are too cute for words and we can't stop kissing you!

After several poo-valanches this week, we moved you into size 2 diapers. You see, your mom doesn't like cleaning up poop off the couch, and washing the babysling every time you do your business. Also charming is you prefer to poop in a dry diaper, so you like to wait until I have just changed your diaper before you let loose. You also seem to think this is pretty funny so you make it all okay by giving me your best smile as we head back to your room to clean you up.

You really like being naked (I think this is a boy thing). I usually let you get some fresh air on your bum when I am changing you, and you also like to be laid out on a towel for some bare bum time and belly rubs as well. You don't like tummy time at all, so we have tried it sans clothes which seems to work better. Except you like to pee, so it means a lot of towels in the laundry.

I think your dad's favourite part of your development is that you are smiling so much now, and you have found your voice. You coo and grunt and earlier this week you laughed in your sleep. I can't wait until you laugh when you are awake! Though you have a lot of toys, there is really only one you are interested in so far and that is your baseball bear which vibrates when you pull the baseball away from it. We think this bear is a little...ummm...well, it's a little weird. But you like to stare intently at his face, so that's cool.
I have been telling people that you are growing like a weed, and I'm not kidding. You have been in your 3-6 month clothes for weeks now (I think you are just eager to get into your designer threads). I swear you have way nicer clothes than your dad and me...Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, Tommy Hilfiger...I don't have any of those labels hanging in my closet! Your dad and I think you have huge hands and feet...maybe this means you are going to be tall like your dad. I hope so, because being 5'4 has its limitations and I like having tall people around to reach things for me. Your legs and arms are super strong and you are already practicing your soccer and boxing moves. We have to be careful because you like to swipe at our faces to grab our glasses. You also like to suck on your hands (and my hands). We tried to give you a pacifier (2 different kinds) but you have shown no interest. So instead you drool all over me, which I don't mind, I mean, what's a little baby drool when I am covered in breast milk, baby poop/pee, and spitup already? No biggy, that's for sure.

What else is there to say? Your favourite song is "When I'm 64". I only know the words to the first verse and I can't remember how the chorus goes (I'll work on that). We will continue to work our way through the Beatles' song book in the coming months. You still get the hiccups, but not 3 times a day like you used to. You really like to eat (as we can all see from your baby chubs) and you are not very patient with your dear old mom when you get hungry. You get really cranky and make this "amuh amuh amuh" sound which makes your dad and me laugh. Then you put your little barracuda mouth on my boob as punishment for making you wait. You also cried your first real tear this past month, which I kissed away, and my heart broke a little. You will learn that I am a total softy, and I am going to have to toughen up or you will get whatever you want out of me.

We have worked out a nice routine so that Mom gets to shower every day. I feed you, then take a shower while you sit in your car seat (very patiently I might add). Then I sit you on the toilet while I get dressed and put my makeup on. I don't know what I'm going to do once you are mobile, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it!

It seems like a lot of people have a lot of advice for us on how to raise you. One thing that is very controversial is that we have you sleep with us right now. It just works out better because you wake up a couple of times a night to eat so this way we all get some sleep. I have been told that "we will never get you out of our bed" but I don't think that is true. Plus, I love waking up and seeing you next to me and watching you sleep. You look so sweet and happy, secure and content, how could I leave you alone in another room? I think you are still too little, and I'm not ready.There have been many offers of babysitting (everyone wants to be with you!) but I am just not ready to be away from you, not even for a minute. So, until I am ready, everyone will just have to wait. It is actually physically painful for me to not be with you. All I can do is think about you, then my boobs leak, and I just end up getting all stressed out. This may seem weird to people, but it is just how it is. I am sure that I will eventually be ready, but not just yet.You are starting to make the "amuh amuh amuh" sound so I better wrap this up and give you the boob. Little Lumpkin, you are so wonderful. Your dad and I have so much love for you, and we can't wait to see what this next month brings.

Love,
Mom

1 month

Nicknames: You decide.

We have a tonne of nicknames for Max. And by a tonne, I mean...like...12. We're not sure which one we like best, so we thought we'd put it out to the internet for a vote. So here they are in no particular order:

Porkchop
Maxy Paxy
Maxy Poopoo
Lil' Barracuda
Button
Kitten
Jubjub
Little dude/Little man
Lumpkin
Awesome Possum
Gruntbuggly
Baby Poogie
edited to add: Sweet Baboo

I usually switch up the nickname based on his current mood or what he is up to. I won't tell you which one is my favourite until we count the votes. Okay...go!

Sleeping 101: Baby steps.

I'm happy to report that we have made some progress in the sleeping department. For the past four nights, we have put Max in his crib when he first falls asleep. That alone is huge. It means that Mommy and Daddy can have some "alone" time in our room. It's been a while since we had any "alone" time, if you know what I mean and I think you do. Max typically wakes up after and hour or two. I then bring him into our room and feed him and (hopefully I'm not jinxing us) he goes back to sleep. He still wakes up to eat every 2 or 3 hours, but there haven't been any all night parties this week (at least none that I have been invited to).
I forgot to mention that Max went to his first barbeque last weekend and he met his uncle David for the first time. Definitely a big weekend! I think that Max is just what the ladies in our social circle have been wishing for. A little boy (born on his dad's birthday no less) to get their men on the "family planning" bandwagon. I have been half-joking with the guys that Max needs some buddies so they better get moving. It will be interesting to see who gets knocked up first...guess we'll just have to wait and see on that.

Sleeping 101: Still working on it.

Well. Sleeping between the time when the sun sets and rises still poses us some challenges. It truly is hit or miss with this little guy. I have no idea why some nights we manage to go to bed at 11pm and others we end up staying up until 6am. I guess it is just what life is like for a 7 week old baby (that's right - 7 weeks old!).

When Max does sleep, it is typically when the sun is shining. It can be kind of frustrating because I want him to sleep at night, so umm...so I can sleep at night, with the rest of the world! Ah well. This will work itself out eventually, right? Until then, please be patient.

Playdates and Pedicures.

We hit a few milestones this week, two of the big ones being Max's first social smile and the commencement of grunts and cooing that sound a bit like conversation starters (by Scott's standards anyway). In addition to the smiles and grunts, Max also had his first playdate with his girlfriends Maya (6 months) and Soleil (9 months). He definitely needs a few pointers from his dad as he pretty much slept through the whole afternoon. It was actually a miracle that we even made it over to Jen's (Maya's mom) as Max has started his new "schedule" which is sleep just fine for two nights in a row (meaning get up once), then party until the wee hours on the 3rd night. I was very tired/worn out from this, but I decided I was in dire need of some company and adult interaction, so after managing to get us both washed, clothed and fed, we headed out. As you can see from the pics, a good time was had by all. The nice thing about going over to someone's house when they have a baby, and there are no men around, is that I can breastfeed without having to find a private location, and I don't have to feel self-conscious if Max decides to be fussy, or needs a diaper change - it's all good, they understand.

Last night was "the 3rd night" so of course Max partied until 6am. Nice. Scott stayed up with us (good call) and we made an event out of it. I think Max is having an extended 6 week growth spurt as his sole desire from 10am - 4am was to breastfeed. He done near wore the equipment out. I was pretty much at my wit's end by 4am (and my boobs were empty) so I defrosted a bottle of breastmilk that I had pumped and gave that to him in a bottle. Little dude sucked that back like nothing doing...and was ready for more! I fed him again at 5:30am and he finally decided to throw in the towel and go to sleep. Scott and I followed shortly. It's funny that a 10 pound baby can give two adults a run for their money. I mean, it's funny now that I have had some sleep. Not so funny at 5am. Not funny at all.

I had been looking forward to getting a pedicure all week, so despite being pretty worn out today, I fed the boy, got dressed and hightailed it over to the salon to get my toes looked after. It was the first thing (outside of going to the doctor to get my sore boobs looked at) that I have done for myself since Max was born, and it felt good. Mind you, all we talked about was him, and I was relieved when I got in the car to drive home after an hour. As I turned my key in the lock, I was a bit apprehensive about what I was walking into (would he be screaming from hunger? would Scott be okay?). The boys were sitting on the couch, Max gazing intently at his dad and Scott raving about Max smiling at him. Phew. I can't tell you how relieved I was that everything went okay. So, while a pedicure might not be a milestone listed in the baby books, it was a big milestone for me. Here's to pretty toes!

Successful Baby Bathing 101.

We have survived our first week at home with no third party assistance. I'm not going to lie, I was more than a little worried about how I was going to survive being home alone with a newborn baby. But we did just fine. I mean, there were a few days where I didn't shower until Scott got home, or I showered with the soundtrack of a crying baby in the background, but we survived. All I can say is thank gawd for Grocery Gateway, because if wasn't for them, we would be surviving on pizza.

We have learned a few things about each other over the past month that I forgot to mention in my previous post. First, baby poop smells like buttered popcorn, I kid you not. Second, trying to get a wide awake baby to fall asleep is just about the most frustrating thing in the world. Third, trying to get a sleepy baby to stay awake is a losing battle. The second and third points have been playing out over the past couple of days as Max decided to party from 11pm - 4am on Sunday night/Monday morning. This combined with wanting to nurse every 1 - 2 hours just about made me fall over.

Last night I vowed to keep him awake all evening so that we could go to bed at 11pm. We banged pots and pans, sang loudly, threatened to play Rage Against the Machine, jiggled him on our knees, gave him a bath, and forced him to watch basketball. And success. In bed for a feeding at 10:40pm, snack at 2:40am, 4:30am, 7am, up and out of bed by 7:30am. If you haven't guessed already, Max is having a growth spurt. He is in his first 3 - 6 month clothes as of today. My baby is growing up!

Maxwell Hunter: 1 month old.

Little baby Max - you turned one month old yesterday. I would have posted this on your actual one month birthday, but I was too busy kissing your little cheeks and playing with your toes to sit down at the computer. It is hard to believe that it has been a full month since we met - it feels like it was only yesterday. Your dad says that it definitely feels like a full month (at least!) but for me it has been a blur. You are starting to get more alert now and while you aren't ready to play with your toys, you are very interested in what is going on around you (especially lights and the Happy Cat picture). When you look at me with your big soulful eyes, my heart swells (and my boobs ache). Your lusty wails when you are hungry make me smile a bit - you are very serious when it comes to your dinner - and your dad and I can't help but laugh when you root around his chest, confused as to why he has no food for you.
Our lives have changed forever now, and we would never go back. Life is a bit slower, and I have fewer expectations of what I can get done in a day - "to do" lists are one item long and they consist of "enjoy your baby". You are so beautiful and innocent, I just can't get enough of you. It breaks your dad's heart to go to work everyday because he just wants to be with you all day, every day. You are growing and developing so fast, I swear you have new baby chubs every day. It's a good thing we have some 3 - 6 month clothes because you are almost out of your newborn clothes.

At one month old you tipped the scales at nine pounds 7 ounces - that is almost 2 pounds higher than your birth weight. I am thrilled because we had a bit of a slow start with the breastfeeding. The best money I have spent was to get a lactation consultant to come over to the house to help us. The bond we have from breastfeeding is amazing and I am so glad I stuck it out with you (even though you can be a bit of a barracuda when we are getting you latched on sometimes). Seeing you relax and close your eyes, your little chubby hand holding onto me, makes me forget all of the challenges I went through to get to this point.

I thought I knew love before I met you, but now I know that I only had a glimmer of an understanding. True, pure, unconditional, overwhelming, all-encompassing love, that is the love I have for you. When parents tell their children free friends that "there is nothing like it" they are absolutely right. And there really are no words to describe the way my heart swells every time I look at you. You have so many people in your life that love you, all little boys should be so lucky. I can't wait to see what this next month will bring.

Love,
Mom (aka "the titty lady")

Lost in babyland.

Well, we finally sorted out the breastfeeding thing with the help of a lactation consultant that I hired to come to the house to help us out. Once we got going Max and I were both much happier. Me, because I felt like a huge failure not being able to breastfeed my baby and sterilizing pumps and bottles after every feeding is exhausting. Max, because, well, breast is best and he loves to get up close and personal with his Mama. We have mastered two positions, feeding while lying down and feeding while sitting up and using the mybrestfriend pillow that Scott bought me on ebay (because he loves me). It also means that we are able to get a lot more sleep because (and I never thought I would do this) we are actually cosleeping. Meaning, I have brought Max into my bed and he sleeps with us, at least while he is eating every 2 - 3 hours. This way he actually goes right back to sleep after his 11:30pm feeding and stays in bed until 6:30am. I still have to wake up and feed him, but we don't have to get up and party, which I truly appreciate.

My mom has been taking wonderful care of the both of us (Max and I both have colds) and I don't know what I would have done without her the past 2 weeks. I am totally not okay with the fact that she is going back to BC on Saturday (boo!). At least Scott has a long weekend, so we will get 3 days with him to have some family time. I think it is hard for him to leave us in the morning when he goes to work. It is a tough transition for all of us, but we are getting there.
I don't get out every day (in fact with being sick I went four days without leaving the house) but we have ventured out to the grocery store and we even had lunch out at Licks. I never imagined how hard it would be just to get showered, dressed, and out the door with a baby. Everything has to be timed with his feedings and with him eating every 2 to 3 hours it means that any trip out can be a maximum of 2 hours before we have to be back for titty time. A glamorous life for sure. Totally worth it though - I wouldn't change it for the world.

Is there anyone who hasn't seen my breasts?

Because, really, I have lost count of the number of people who have poked, prodded, tweaked, squeezed and examined my breasts in the last two weeks. Funny, when they stop becoming sexual objects and turn into mere facilators of sustinance you get a lot less shy. I now understand why many women are nonplussed about whipping their boobs out in public to feed their babies. Not that I'm quite there yet, but seriously, if you are one of the few who have yet to see the glory that is my breasts, come on over - they really are spectacular. All sarcasm aside, Max and I have had some challenges dealing with the whole breastfeeding thing. First he was born tongue tied, so he had to have his tongue clipped. Then he worked me raw, I mean RAW to the point that I had to stop breastfeeding and pump my milk and feed him from a bottle. I should note that he clearly was getting enough milk from me because he gained a pound in one week and is now a whopping 8 pounds 4 ounces! Now that I am pretty much healed up, we are trying again, but after getting the bottle for three days, he is one lazy little boy who is not so interested in putting the work in to get the milk out of his mom's boobs. So, I have called a lactation consultant who will be coming to my home tomorrow to help us figure this out. Yet another person who will see my breasts (wee!). I am too stubborn to give up on this just yet.

The good news is that my mom arrived last night from BC for a two week visit. This is especially good because Scott has come down with bronchitis and is in pretty rough shape plus we can't have him holding Max while he is so sick. I had two days of caring for Max solo which was kind of brutal as all those awesome endorphins I had the first week home have dwindled and I am now at that point where I am so tired I feel drunk. With my mom here I managed to get some sleep today so I feel much better. Something about moms, they just make the sun shine brighter and everything okay. Max loves her and seems to be willing to conk out for her much easier than he will for me. Praise be for that, I'll take all the help I can get. Scott goes back to work tomorrow and I can't believe that it has already been 2 weeks! What a blur...I feel like we just brought Max home from the hospital!

Week 1: The Adventures of Mommyhood.

We've made it through our first week as a family of three and lived to tell about it. So far so good, I think anyway. The toughest part is probably getting sleep in small increments when you can instead of big blocks. Funny, even when I'm tired and it's 4am and Max is wide awake, I am happy. I am just trying to drink it all in - I feel like he's growing so fast and I might miss something.

We have mastered the art of changing poopy diapers, gotten peed on several times, become experts at doing many things with only one free hand and managed to shower every day except for one. The thing that has been the toughest for me is the breastfeeding. Apparently women that are fair skinned have the most sensitive skin and I can attest to that. Max is a good eater, and oh my goodness he has worked me raw. I am doing my best to work through it, making sure he is getting a good latch, that I am positioning him right, airing the "sisters" out when I get a chance (quite a sight really), and applying Purelan and glycerin pads between feedings. But still, holy shit, when you have a little boy eating for 40 minutes a go every 2 - 3 hours, it is hard to heal. I love that he is gaining weight and filling out like a champ and that is what makes it worth it, but don't kid, breastfeeding is hard.
Now that things have settled down, it's interesting to observe my hormones come into play. The day Max was born, I didn't cry. Scott cried, Jennifer cried, but I think I was too "medicated" and likely in shock/overwhelmed to let go. So, on Sunday night, I was up in our bedroom holding Max in my arms, just looking at his beautiful face and out of nowhere I started bawling. It wasn't an ugly cry, but it was a good one nonetheless. All of a sudden I felt the responsibility to protect him from the world, and saw his vulnerability, how it really is all on me to make sure he is okay, and that even when I think it isn't possible, I have more love in my heart for him. I want so badly to be a good mom, and there is so much to learn. I hope he is patient with me, I'm definitely a work in progress.