mommy, what are you going to be?

It was an innocent question. One that was preceded with clarifications about the fact that Max is a boy, and daddy is a man, and that Max will one day be a man, and that Cameron is a girl, and I am a woman, and that Cameron will one day be a woman. And then she asked me that question that I have been asking myself for a long, long time.

"Mommy, what are you going to be?"

Now, for sure, she was looking for the next step after being a woman - and I hated to burst her bubble and say, "well, that's it". But it really hit me in a much more meaningful way than that.

What am I going to be?

Truth is, I haven't completely figured it out. I know for sure what I don't want to be. I'm lucky enough that I have a new opportunity starting next week that is a huge step in the right direction towards what I think I want to be. It's scary and exciting and holy shit, I'm really doing it...I can really make this happen (with a lot of work and a little luck).

I want to work in the online and mobile space.
I want to create.
I want to communicate. And advocate. And educate.
I want to be inspired and maybe even inspire.

I want to do things that matter.

I want to be able to care for my family.
And find balance for myself.
I want to not feel guilty about calling in sick to work because my daughter has a tummy ache or my son who has Autism hasn't slept all night and is unable to go to school because he won't be able to function.

I want it all.  I am going to have it all.

I'll let you know when I figure out what I am going to be.