Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Sticky Fingers & Knuckle Dimples.

It doesn't happen often, but some mornings we are running early instead of running late. Actually, it only ever happens if one of Max's therapy sessions gets cancelled last minute, which is what happened this morning (Max's Occupational Therapist is très sick). Suddenly we didn't have to rush to get out the door. We had an extra hour to eat breakfast and get everyone dressed. The thing is, we didn't need an hour...we only needed a half hour. Once he is dressed, Max starts climbing the walls, expecting me to get the show on the road. What to do?

I had a card that I wanted to put in the mail today. It was a note to Heather & Mike Spohr that I had been meaning to send for a few weeks. I finally got off my butt and wrote to them after I read Heather's heartbreaking post about Mike's first day back to work after the loss of their beautiful Maddie. Since Max was itching to get outside, I thought I'd try walking to the post office with him, which is 2 blocks away.

I expected that he would have a meltdown about half way there, and that I'd be forced to heave him up over my shoulder and carry him home. As usual, he surprised me. He looked up at me, and reached out with his sticky fingers and took my hand. We walked to the post office, hand in hand, enjoying the sunshine and the warm breeze. When we got there, Max stayed calm as I bought some stamps, and he even put the card in the mailbox for me. As we left the post office and started walking home, the Club Nouveau version of "Lean on Me" came over the plaza speakers, and I thought to myself, how beautiful, how fitting. There are so many days when I need someone to lean on, but today I am strong, and I am offering my shoulder to someone else in need, someone who I have never met who is in another country, on another coast. I may not be so strong tomorrow, but today I have strength to spare.

We walked home, Max smiling his big beautiful smile the entire way. I squeezed his hand and felt those wonderful little boy knuckle dimples and remembered some of the best advice I ever got from another parent whose son also has a developmental delay. She told me "Make sure you take time to enjoy Max, just for being Max. Don't stay so focused on the future and how you want to fix him that you miss out on what an awesome kid he is now". It's easy to get wrapped up in all the stress and worry of what is going to happen in the future. It's important to take time to appreciate and enjoy what you have now. Maddie has taught me that. Max has taught me that too.


  1. Beautiiful post Kat. I am happy for your beautiful morning with Max.

  2. Anonymous12:14 p.m.

    Such a beautiful image. . . knuckle dimples, smiles.


  3. Anonymous1:52 p.m.

    Trying... not... to... cry... at... work.


  4. Oh my goodness, Kat - what a beautiful, beautiful, post. Thank you for writing that.