Sunday, March 20, 2005

Don't ask me for $$ when I'm trying to buy booze (and don't call me Ma'am!).

I don't like being asked for money. Not via the phone (which I rarely answer anyway), or a stranger knocking at my front door (which I rarely answer anyway), or at the grocery store check line ("would you like to donate $2 for MS research?"), or through work affiliated charity giving (you want to take MORE money off my paycheque??), and ESPECIALLY not when I am trying to enter the LCBO.

Scene: Kat, after completing the weekly grocery shopping decides to go to the LCBO to buy some girl-drink-drunk-coolers and some staple-of-the-house-Canadian Club. The doorway of the LCBO is crowded with no less than seven women and their daughters plus their accompanying signs, pink balloons, pink ribbons and hands extended outward towards innocent unassuming customers.

Kat's Inner Dialogue: "Fuckshitcuntwhorecocksuckerandtits - I really need to buy booze and there is no way around these bitches".

Soccer Mom: "Would you like to support us in our breast cancer walkathon? We're walking 60 kilometres!"

Soccer Mom's Inner Dialogue: "Certainly, if you have money to buy booze, you can afford to give us a little money."

Kat: (attempting to dodge little girls dressed in pink - what the hell are they doing in the LCBO anyway??) "Uhhh...I already give to other charities..."

Kat steps into the LCBO only to be immediately accosted by a woman shilling Bailey's.

Bailey's woman: "Ma'am, would you like to try some Bailey's?"

Kat's Inner Dialogue: "I can't believe that woman who is old enough to be my mother just called ME Ma'am! ARRRRRGH - ALL I WANT TO DO IS BE LEFT ALONE TO BUY MY BOOZE IN PEACE!!!"

Kat: "No thanks." Walking quickly to the back of the store searching for her coolers....

I know I sound like a total fucking bitch, but I absolutely despise being guilted into giving money. I give to charity, and not just $2 either. When I give to charity, I want a tax receipt, I want to know where the money is going and that it is a recognized charity. I will never support charities that use children to con me into giving money (awh, isn't that cute the little girl is selling chocolate bars) and I get super pissed off at people who position themselves outside of stores and attempt to get me while my wallet is still open.

Note: Baileys is fine in coffee and on ice cream, but not something that is exotic and needs to be sampled (we all know what the stuff tastes like). If you want me to buy it, give me a coupon or something but leave me alone. And don't call me Ma'am, Ma'am.


  1. I SOOOO agree!! I hate when people, even the santa's at Christmas are hanging around the outside of store entries!! We donate every year to local shelters and Toy's For Tots, I don't need someone sitting at a table with cookies, or a coin jar to look at me like I'm evil for ignoring them. Same with the sample people, if we want a sample we will walk up and get one, if we don't, we won't.
    I also ignore the phone if at all possible. If the caller i.d. doesn't show a name I recognize, I'm not answering it. They make you feel even worse if you don't want to donate!! Talk about invasion!

  2. Telemarketers are one of life's biggest annoyances.

    But getting called out to in public places to donate and the looks they give you if you pass them by is enough to make people feel guilty and angry at the same time. I always feel bad if I pass them by, but, like you said, I give in other ways, and not random coins here and there for this penny jar and that.

  3. This hits a nerve. I can't stand being asked at the checkout to donate another $2 or whatever, to whatever cause. I hate the begging at the store doorway, or worse, the banks.

    And let's not talk about the Blue Jean Fridays at work, where you get the 'priviledge' of wearing jeans for a two dollar donation, but lord help you if you decide your damn work attire is just fine, and you're not inclide to donate your two-I-busted-my-ass-for-this dollars to this week's charity: The Rescue of the Mongolian Dung Beatle. The dirty looks that are heap upon you by the 'social' commitment. Like I give a shit. I just swish my ass in my 'dress' pants and use my toonie for a double-double at Tim's.

    As for the ma'am thing, I'm in my mid-thirties, and I gotta tell you, it was a *shock* being called ma'am. Makes you sound like your granny. Plus I worked as a temp for an answer service, years ago, and the owner scolded me once when I called her ma'am. She said, that's how you addressed the Queen. Whatever.

  4. I was asking my mom about the whole Ma'am thing and she said she was taught when she was growing up that you always called a woman who was older than you Ma'am and a man who was older than you Sir. The problem I have with this, is I believe that Ma'am also infers someone is married (short for Madame?) so that would explain a person who is not married taking offense at it. Me, it just makes me feel old.

  5. They were handing out free booze!?!?

  6. Well, Baileys isn't really something I would want to sample, so no, not really.

  7. bailey's is like wray and nephew rum cream, iyah! it's a damn bloody good drink.

    Kat... I know whut you are saying about the "ma'am" stuff. i cant say it at my work place, ppl get vexed. I just go, "have a nice day, lady"

    usually they laugh at that...