Thursday, May 19, 2005

I'm addicted to you, but you know that you're toxic.

Britbot and the Dirtbag Opportunist
I am a little ashamed to admit it, but yes, I watched the premiere of the Britney & Kevin show last night. I believe I managed to clean up all of the brainmatter that dripped out my ears during that hour of my life that I will never get back. I'm not 100% on how I even feel about what I witnessed. I know I feel kind of sorry for her, because she is such a shell - an empty one at that. It makes her the perfect product pusher, whether the product is her (young, sexy, dumb, blonde) or diet coke, or sketchers, or whatever. It also makes her an incredibly shallow, boring, uneducated, vapid, clueless person. And now it has been laid out for all of us to see.

This is what we call massive airbrushing, or vaseline on the lenseWhat amazes me is that her handlers thought this was a good idea. How does knowing that Britney is essentially a desperate woman with no self-esteem or self-respect who just wants to "fuck all day" (her words, not mine) help her? At least with Nick and Jessica the production was of decent quality, and you got a good laugh at their interaction as a couple. I just felt terribly uncomfortable last night as I saw Britney fall for this player who is clearly only along for the ride. "Love is love" - that's fucking deep dude. She's so desperate that she married some guy who was willing to leave his girlfriend who was pregnant with their second kid. Wow, great catch there. It isn't that I think she is worth more, or deserves better, I'm just horrified that the "geniuses" that built her up are letting her expose herself in such an unflattering way. Who knows, maybe America will eat her up and love her even more for showing them her husband's ass and talking about favourite sexual positions for an entire hour. Now I understand why this is only a six episode series - how long can you stretch out pig faces and ground breaking confessionals like "I want to marry Brad Pitt" and "Eminem is brilliant"? Let's hope that baby of her fulfills her unsatiated need of being loved unconditionally. It will probably be the only being in this world that doesn't need her to be anything but who she is.


  1. Perfectly put. I watched it, because I like Britney's music and I was curious.
    I was also bored quickly and thought the "banter" was immature.
    She showed a very airheaded side. I wasn't impressed and probably won't watch again.

  2. i was another sucker... sat through this 1 hour tragedy of a tv series. worst part.. i wish i was warned of effects from watchin the show...serious motion sickness from the terrible camera work... i know its a home vid but man even my 10 yr old bro can hold his hand a bit still for a vid cam.

  3. I'm sorry for the pain, you guys. I should've warned you all. Britney and Kevin were on the Ellen Show earlier this week and they were showing clips of the show and talking about it. It made me sick - the content, the production, the camera work. ALL OF IT. But now everyone knows that.

    The saddest of all is that Kevin essentially didn't want to get married to her, but she had a dream in her mind and made sure it was fulfilled. Great foundation. I wonder what the Las Vegas odds are now...

  4. I too, witnessed the unfortunate appearance of Britney and Kevin on Ellen. Poor Ellen. She really tried to develop some sort of witty banter with those two but it just wasn't happening. It was pathetic enough just seeing Kevin lounging on the Ellen couch in his designer duds and diamond earrings, I just couldn't turn into a whole show based around them.

    As a new Mom, I feel that Britney is wholly unprepared for the challenges of motherhood. Mind you, I suppose she can afford to pay someone to be the baby's mother anyway.

  5. Anonymous5:22 p.m.

    Well put... I watched because I was curious but I felt like I needed a shower afterwards. I was embarrassed and sad for Britbot. She's pathetically depserate for validation, love and affection and it felt really weird watching someone so desperate. I felt like I was seeing the part of Britney that no one should see yet there is was, laid bare for all the world to view. And this is a good idea??

    I wonder how her main fan base made up of tweens feels watching this crap...all the talk about marriage and committment being junk, all the talk about sex positions and how many times Britney screws a day. And then to see how that dirt bag Kevin treats her... And Britney is a role model for these kids? Truly frightening. The only thing more frightening is that fact that she's going to be a mom herself in the next 6 months. Sad, sad, sad.

    The only reason I'm tempted to watch next week is to see k-fed get the crap kicked out of him by Britney's bodyguard.

  6. i think we watch because it's like the proverbial car accident thing--you don't want to watch, but something compels you to. i was sorry i missed it, because yes, i am pathetic enough to want to see how pathetic someone else's life is so my own pathetic little existence won't seem so... um, pathetic.