Sunday, January 09, 2005

Saturday Night: The Longest, Coldest Night of Kat's Life.

His mother never taught him how to share.
I am guessing that Scott has never been good at sharing. The ongoing saga of "Scott the Cover Hog" continues, with the latest instalment called "Saturday Night: The Longest, Coldest Night of Kat's Life". In this chapter, Scott steals all of the covers (impressive as this includes a sheet, a duvet, and a quilt!) an average of two times an hour, commencing at 1am and continuing until 11am. Each time when the beautiful Kat is rudely and coldly awaken, she tugs on the covers, using her full weight to roll them back over Scott to recover her fair share. The nasty Scott waits stealthily for her to fall back asleep before he cruelly yanks them off her leaving her unprotected in the darkened night. When she awakes and tries an alternate tactic of moving into the middle of the bed (bringing herself to the covers, instead of the covers to her) he loudly complains "Hey, move over, you're crowding me!". And that my faithful readers, is why Scott is commonly referred to as "Scotty McFUCKER"! I bet Jon Stewart doesn't hog the covers...

Edited to add: Scott wanted me to point out that he doesn't hog the covers intentionally, that he does this in his sleep and doesn't mean to do it and would stop if he could.


  1. Anonymous5:53 p.m.

    Geez...who knew? He doesn't look like that kinda guy.


  2. I KNOW! He's a trickster, that one. And to think he had us all fooled up until now.

  3. Kat,

    I don't wish to name any names, but there is a cover-stealer in my marriage as well. He shall remain nameless, but were he to comment in your blog, I think he would generally beg for mercy.

  4. Luckily, I never had to share a bed with Scott as a kid. Our relations growing up together were strained enough without that added aggravation. One of us would have probably done the other in while they slept. My heart goes out to you for having to put up with the snoring and cover stealing every night. You're a saint.