American Idol: To Stevie with Love (and apologies).

This is the first American Idol episode I have watched this season. I don't dig on watching a bunch of bad singers get dissed and I don't have enough time to watch Simon et al vet out all the hopefuls to get down to the final 12. So, I am coming at this with no background as to how these singers have performed in previous weeks, I have no connections, I have no idea how much progress anyone has made or if they just had a bad night last night. Nothing.
My first thought in watching the show was "Holy shit, they are making these guys cover Stevie Wonder songs their first night out of the gate?" This seems like a bad idea to me for a few reasons.

1) Stevie Wonder writes some of the hardest material to cover on the face of the earth (he sings it brilliantly and nobody else should ever really try).

2) For the most part, these songs are written for him to sing, and he is a tenor. This means that they don't translate well in other keys so women will have a hard time sounding good covering his material. More on this later.

Okay, my review of last night's performances:

Ace Young: Do I Do
Talk about a porno name, eh? Ace Young? Nice. I thought he started out with high energy and overall he has a good voice. He just never owned the song, he couldn't seem to wrap his voice around it. Also, he's a bit earnest for my liking. Keeners to the back of the bus!

Kellie Pickler: Blame It On the Sun
Carrie Underwood called and she said "you suck!". This was really hard to listen to. She sang with low energy overall and just sounded like she hated the song. I understand that she typically sings country, but man, thank gawd for the short song arrangements. This is a good example of point #2.

Elliot Yamin: Knocks Me Off My Feet
Nice bangs dude. Did you mom cut them for you? This guy is hard to watch. He's the white guy that they let sing in the black gospel choir because he really loves Jesus. I bet Stevie was thinking "damn, how you gonna let some fool mess up my song like that?".

Mandisa: Don't You Worry 'Bout a Thing
One name, eh? That's pretty confident, no? She was pitchy at the start but seemed to sing more in the pocket when she got into her higher register. Again, point #2 - it is hard for women to sing songs meant for tenors without completely reworking the melody.

Bucky Covington: Superstition
This is the point in the show where I really started to question my decision to commit two hours of my life to review these singers. Is this really the best that America has to offer us? That said, of all the singers so far, Bucky did the best of making the song his own, gravely voice and all.

Melissa McGhee: Lately
Yet another woman sounding pitchy and low energy, gee, what a surprise. She shouldn't be sitting down at all given this song is already challenging for her. All that does it restrict her breathing and she needs all the help she can get. I thought this performance was brutal, but the judges seemed to like it. A clear case of them hearing something different than what is coming across to the viewers at home.

Lisa Tucker: Signed, Sealed, Delivered
If I were at Healey's, I'd think, "she's a pretty good karaoke singer". But this is American Idol, so I'm thinking "she's pretty weak in her upper register" and she's trying to rock out but it just isn't happening. Again, the judges are hearing something different in the studio than we are hearing at home. This performance didn't translate for me.

Kevin Covais: Part-time Lover
Lol. The fact that this little guy even picked this song is funny. He is the white Erkle. At least he seems to have a sense of humour about it. I can't really hate this guy, it's like watching your little brother at a talent show. You cringe, but hope he does okay.

Katharine McPhee: Until You Come Back to Me
What the hell was she wearing? Regardless, this is the first singer tonight who has actually sang in the pocket. She made a smart choice to sing a song written for a woman to sing, it was actually in a good key for her. I didn't even mind the little bit of twang she added in, I was so happy to hear someone sing decently.

Taylor Hicks: Livin For the City
How old is this dude? I feel like they let Michael McDonald into a high school talent show or something? Isn't there an age limit on this show? He dances like the old people at weddings. Just. Stop.
Paris Bennett: All I Do
She owned this song right off the bat and her voice has an edge to it that works for her. I loved her energy throughout the song and this was by far my favourite performance of the night. The singing during her little Seacrest interview was a bit much, but whatevs.

Chris Daughtry: Higher Ground
This guy has a great rock voice and made a wise choice in terms of song selection. He sang in tune, and didn't try to do all the crazy vocal runs that other singers fell victim to in tonight's show. I didn't love the whole dragging the mic stand around the stage bit, but I always think that looks odd. I'll be interested to see what he does next week.

Worst Performances: Kellie, Elliot, Bucky
Best Performances: Katharine, Paris, Chris

Woke up this mornin', got yourself a gun.

I had to laugh this morning when I was reading Tina's blog about watching The Sopranos. First off, I'm glad that there is someone else who is as hooked in as me. I friggin' love movies and tv shows about the mob. Love. Them. Not sure why, I mean, I don't typically dig on gore and violence and misogynistic men. But I can't get enough of The Sopranos. There I was on Sunday night, settled into bed with this huge baby bump eagerly awaiting the season premiere. Scott will tell you it was all I could talk about all weekend, and I even shut off the ringer on the phone lest I be interrupted.

My favourite parts of Sunday night's premiere included:

- Tony and Carmela's new favourite dinner spot is a sushi restaurant (how cultured)
- hearing Carmela say "Porsha Kai-anne" in her Jersey accent. So classy!
- wondering how they get Gene to hang himself and look so convincing without actually hanging the actor?
- seeing Uncle Junior shoot Tony and then go hide in the closet - what a way to end the show! Holy crap!

The Sopranos almost made up for Grey's Anatomy being such a dud. Bor-ing. I don't think anybody had the sex all episode? How disappointing. Thank gawd American Idol is down the 12 singers. Now that they have skimmed off the non-talent I can start watching and giving my weekly review. For the next 6 weeks anyway, until the little guy arrives and MY LIFE CHANGES FOREVER. I'm not scared. I'm not overwhelmed. Not me. Not at all.

GRR ARGH. I'll take the Fishstick over the Oscars any day of the week.

Was I the only one who felt super bummed that Grey's Anatomy got bumped for the Oscars last night? My Sunday night just wasn't the same. After a weekend of baby classes (more on that later), I felt like I had earned my special hour of tv on Sunday night that somehow makes it okay that Monday is only hours away and work is just around the corner. But no, instead I watched Jon Stewart's monologue (he was very good by the way), saw George Clooney win his best supporting actor Oscar for Syriana (which was the only Oscar nominated movie I saw this year anyway) and then I did exciting things like laundry. And I wrote thank you cards for all of the awesome gifts we got at the shower. But it really wasn't the same without Grey's Anatomy to look forward to.

See, after last week's episode, when Madison got the poison ivy rash all over her ve-jay-jay, and she was laughing and Derek was laughing, I kind of stopped hating her. I hate that I don't hate her anymore. GRR ARGH (more on that later). And wow, George is some kind of pussy. Dude, what did you expect to happen? You know that girl will sleep with pretty much any guy who propositions her. Get over it. And wow (again), how bad an idea is it for Derek and Miranda to start going for walks together in the morning and being "friends". How long do you think it will take before they are rolling around in the leaves? I mean, I can't wait for them to get back to having the sex, don't get me wrong. Just didn't picture it happening that way is all. Nothing wrong with a good nature(d) bonk.

So, anyway, a few months ago I signed Scott and I up for this new parents/labour/newborns class at the hospital where the little guy will be born. I figured better to get it over with in one weekend (2 days) then to drag him out once a week for 2 months. And while I was probably right, boy does sitting in an auditorium looking at spread eagle ve-jay-jays being stretched to kingdom come for 2 days get tiresome. What was good about it was seeing 20 other pregnant ladies, of all shapes and sizes and realizing, hey, I'm about normal. I'm average in the spectrum of pregnant lady size. So suck on that all you people with your comments. By Sunday afternoon Scott and I had about had our fill of slides of newborns and were ready to go home to veg (actually, Scott went to the gym, I napped). Driving out of the parking lot we saw what we both deemed to be the best license plate ever: "GRR ARGH". Damn, why didn't I think of that? That sums up most of feelings as of late to perfection. So GRR ARGH - my hips are killing me! GRR ARGH this kid has had the hiccups all day! GRR ARGH why are cribs so hard to put together?! GRR ARGH I haven't seen below my navel in months! Just GRR ARGH, okay?

32 weeks and counting.

With only 8 weeks to go until the little guy's due date, I gotta say, I am starting to feel a little overwhelmed. We picked up the nursery furniture on Saturday (despite The Bay's best efforts to make that impossible...long boring story) and Jennifer also came to Oakville for the weekend to co-host my baby shower with Stephanie. Jennifer and I got in a day full of girl fun (aka "things Scott won't do with me") which included Japanese food at Sushi Niwa, (where I apparently mortified the woman sitting behind us with talk of circumcision and regaling the details of recent attempts at being intimate where I broke into tears exclaiming "I feel like a beached whale"). We also went to H & M, rented "In Her Shoes", caught up on gossip, all things baby, and Jennifer's new book. Lucky for Scott, he escaped this by going away for a night of male bonding with his buddies which involved copious amounts of beer, poker, and chest thumping. I think he feels like he better get his fill before he officially becomes a dad and his life ends. Funny how men and women prepare for parenthood different. Me, I am researching nursing pillows and getting the carpets cleaned. Scott, not so much.
So, the shower. Ahh, the shower. It was wonderful! Stephanie appeared at our house around 11:30am with Shane and Charlotte in tow, arms laden with decorations and cake and punch ingredients. She and Jennifer went to work and decorated (crazy Monkey theme!) and got the house ready. Scott reappeared from his man cave excursion to pick up our Toronto friends from the GO station (bloggers Adam, Chris and Lulu, non-blogger Karem). Shane entertained Charlotte and helped move heavy things. And then people started arriving. Our little house filled up quickly with friends and presents.

We were completely spoiled (gifts included everything from a breast pump, baby bath and ducky towel set, lots of super cute and stylin' clothes, books (that crinkle!), albums, designer diaperbag, robeez shoes, diapering essentials and nipple cream (gasp!). And there was cake - have I mentioned my love of cake? Also, Stephanie made this super yummy punch that had pineapple juice and raspberries and it was terrific. Almost made me not miss wine. Almost. Scott and I are very blessed to have such wonderful supportive friends.

Yesterday we had another ultrasound to check out the little guy. We confirmed that he is still a he. His heartbeat (156 beats per minute!) is strong, and he weighs about 4 pounds (so we are on track for a 7 poundish baby). Good stuff. We saw him wiggle his eyebrows, and he waved his fingers at us. He is officially in "head down" position, which my sad little flattened bladder can attest to. So now we wait while he cooks a bit longer. This weekend we have baby classes on Saturday and Sunday where we will learn baby things. Not sure exactly what - I hear tell of things like bathing your baby, burping your baby, and we were told to bring 2 pillows and a blanket, which sounds a bit ominous, if you ask me. What have we gotten ourselves into?

McDreamy vs. McSteamy.

Goodness, Grey's Anatomy sure is going hard on the cliff hangers (you had me at hello!). Let's see, since the infamous Superbowl Shower Scene show, they have ended with Meredith holding a bazooka in some dude's chest, had one action packed bomb exploding extravaganza (with a baby to boot), and now we are left with Meredith peeling George's clothes off him? Wowza. Doesn't take much to get that girl on her back (whachoosay!). My main thoughts about this week's show include:

- McSteamy looked like an older, beefier, hawter version of Leonardo DiCaprio - and if I were Madison, I wouldn't stick around waiting for Derek to forgive my cheatin' ass, I'd be back in NYC with McSteamy who actually loves me and wants me

- I loved the Preston and Cristina dancing scene (nice ipod advertisement...), but I loved it even more when Preston gave her the "I am Preston Burke speech". He is so fine...especially when he is acting all indignant and put upon

- I am still in shock about Meredith gettin' jiggy with George, she is going to break his heart and make things super awkward at work. I think she was so sad from seeing her father she let George's promise of never leaving her win her over, but man, this is going to be some drama...brings to mind the phrase "don't shit where you eat" as in, don't bring the craziness into your household or your workplace Meredith!

Okay, now that I got THAT out of my system -
The SNIPPITY SNIP DEBATE

Up until yesterday morning, I thought that Scott and I had decided to have the little guy circumcised. Mind you, I have always felt the decision was Scott's to make (what do I know about having a penis?). The only opinion I offered was from a "aesthetics" point of view (which is biased because it's all I know), and also the fact that with part of my family being Jewish, most of the men I am related to have in fact been "cut" for religious reasons.

Well, let me tell you, Scott went and done changed his mind! Seems like Scott did some reading (damn internet) and found out that not only is there no proof that circumcision has any medical benefits, but the rate of circumcision in Canada has been dropping steadily in the past ten years. In fact, in 2003, only 12 - 13% of baby boys in Canada were circumcised. I was a bit surprised that this issue was back on the table, so I emailed my best friend Jennifer, asking her what Lisa, her boss at Octopus had done (she is known to be informed in the matters of childbirth and little boys). I promptly received the following email from her:

Lisa says Elliot is not circumcised and this is why:

1. She says, "My friends all had boys and only one of them circumcised her kid and she said it was the worst day of her life. You've spent nine months making this perfect baby and then you cut his skin off."

2. The arguments for circumcision usually go like this: a) it's cleaner, fewer infections - this is not true, no one I or Lisa knows with an uncircumcised child has ever had any trouble. b) his penis should look like his Dad's so he doesn't feel weird - Lisa says, "By the time his penis looks at all like his dad's he's going to be too old to be looking at his Dad's penis anyway."

3. Basically Lisa says there's just no good reason to do it.

And you're right, it is getting to be less and less common as the years go by. No one's going to be laughing at your little boy's penis in the locker room. Like you said, most little boys are uncircumcised these days.

Whew. That's a lot of penis talk for one e-mail.

She's right...that is a lot of penis talk! I'm not really looking for anyone else's opinion on the matter, but if you'd like to comment, feel free.

By the way - I am 31 weeks today (9 more to go!).

A hard choice to make.

Bossa's recent health problems have brought to light that having two cats is a bit unmanageable. Especially with a newborn on the way, something has to give. We haven't wanted to face it though, mostly because as much as her nickname is "Captain Bitchface", we love her dearly. I have had her since she was a kitten (she'll be 10 years old this summer) and Scott is very attached to her as well (he is the main cat caregiver in our house, the "dad" if you will).
The main challenge is that she and our other cat Samba have to be separated because Bossa refuses to accept her. This has been going on for over five years and means we are always monitoring both cats, Samba is held prisoner on the top floor of our home, and Bossa is in a constant state of agitation which plays out in different ways that I won't go into here. As I said to Scott last night, "if you are frustrated now, thing of how you will feel when you are going on 2 hours of sleep, have a screaming newborn to contend with, and you have to deal with Bossa too?". While Scott won't be the one to make the tough decision to find her a new home, at this point he has agreed that it is time. So I need to be the heavy, make the rational decision here and pull the trigger.

I wouldn't have even considered letting someone else take Bossa if I didn't know she would be in awesome hands, and hopefully in a situation that would make her happier than where she is now. But a while back, my dear friend Alana offered to take Bossa, and I can't think of a better place for her. See, Alana loves pets, is kind, fun, has a wonderful home, 2 sons, and in her home, Bossa would be the only cat. It may actually work. I include the caveat that if it doesn't work, we will take Bossa back and work on another solution. But I am praying it does work so that I can feel good about this decision and that it's a win-win for everyone.

Last night as I was laying in bed, I started thinking of all the things I needed to tell Alana about Bossa, and I started to feel really sad. There is so much to know, I hadn't even realized it until I started making a mental list.

Things about Bossa:

- she is afraid of the wind
- she likes to sleep on the hot air vent
- when you are sitting down to eat dinner, she will come in the room and give herself a bath, just to be with you, yet still ignoring you
- when you sit on the couch, she will come sit next to you, with her back to you, but leaning into you with all her weight
- she likes to lay in the sun
- she will ask to be let outside, even if it is -10 out, when you open the door she will look at you like "whachoo thinkin' crazy lady? It's too damn cold out there!"
- she likes to eat grass, but you can't let her eat too much because it will make her sick
- she will always complain at you when you empty the dishwasher
- if you are in the kitchen, it must mean that you are there to feed her
- she will greet you at the door like a dog
- she doesn't like to be picked up, but she will tolerate it for a while
- she won't bite you or scratch you (unless you are tormenting her, and even then she gives a warning hiss to let you know "this ain't cool, bitch")
- if she is outside (and you can only put her outside if you are out there with her because she is an indoor cat) but you can't get her to come inside, just shake her food container and she will come running in, at night, use a flash light on her and she will run in the house
- she doesn't have the hops she used to, and if she wants up on something high, she will look at you and meow so you know to lift her up
- she doesn't like other cats and will have a fit if one comes near the house (actually very entertaining)
- she likes to be scratched behind the ears, and she likes belly rubs (but only for a minute or so)
- it's hard to cut her claws - you have to get her when she is relaxed and you start with the front ones, wait a day or so and do the back ones
- she has beautiful eyes, even when she looks like she is eating your soul
- she is very pretty, and she knows it
- if you leave a cupboard open she will go inside to explore, deep kitchen drawers are also excellent
- she is smarter than the average cat
- she likes to wash her paws in her water fountain (a regular bowl of water is not good enough for her)
- you can't leave a big bowl of food out for her because she will eat ALL of it
- she likes to hunt little grey cats
- her favourite place to nap is on a kitchen chair, under the table

- we will miss her deeply, but this really is for the best

Le Sigh.

edited to add: Her favourite toy is a golf ball size ball of tinfoil, which she will bat around the house like a crazy cat

Stop looking at my ve-jay-jay!

Hey - happy valentine's day! I know that I have been complaining a lot lately (and rightly so), but I do want to take a few minutes to be positive. Then I will return to my regularly scheduled pregnancy symptoms (the peeing, the hiccuping baby in my belly, the fact that I haven't seen my toes in a while...).

Scott, who does not especially care for Valentine's day, bought me roses on Saturday. I consider this Valentine's day in advance. He considers this fiscally responsible. I appreciate flowers on any day, so I am not about to complain. Yesterday, I received a wonderful package from my mom, full of brand new baby clothes for the little guy. He is going to be one stylin' little baby. He got a sweater set (with matching booties and hat), designer Coccoli onesies, wee little t-shirt and pants sets (one that is special for Canada Day), and a little striped set of pyjamas from Old Navy that would break your heart. I think that he will look like a little jailbird when he wears that in his crib.

Tonight we are picking up Thai takeout for dinner. I have already bought our favourite Valentine's day dessert - Love Potion #31 (white chocolate and raspberry ice creams swirled with a raspberry ribbon and loaded with heart shaped raspberry filled cups and chocolate chips). I imagine we will exchange gifts, at least, I know I have a gift for Scott. And by then it will be 9pm and I will need to go to bed so I don't fall over. Ah yes, an exciting, lusty life at 30 weeks pregnant. Only 10 (or so) weeks to go!

Onto the other love of my life - Grey's Anatomy. Did you see the show on Sunday? Holy crap! I was on pins and needles for the entire show. Also, how relieved was I that it was only 10:45pm when that bazooka blew up and knocked Meredith on her ass? I would have hit the ceiling if it had been the end of the show, only to be left hanging for another week. I was disappointed with the whole Derek stopping by her house to see her and the whole "you almost died today" conversation. What he should have said was "when I thought I lost you I realized I have made the wrong decision by staying with Madison and I want to be with you". And then he should have taken her in his arms and kissed her, and then carried her to bed to make sweet sweet love to her little fishstick frame. But the writers want to torture me, and so they keep the lackluster Madison around and we have to be happy with Izzy getting it on (being a "doer") with Alex in the broom closet. Le sigh. Best part of the show - when Dr.Bailey was in labour and George looked up at the mirror and told her the baby was crowing and had a lot of hair and she yelled "Stop looking at my ve-jay-jay". Loller skates!

This just in: If you get too fat...

I swear to the Goddess of Fertility, if one more person makes a comment to me about:

1) how little weight they gained during their pregnancy

or

2) how little weight someone else gained during their pregnancy

I am going to blow a fucking gasket. It seems fucking odd to me that we are so grotesquely obsessed with women's weight in this culture that not even pregnant women get cut a break. In a lot of countries the concern is that mom is not getting enough nutrients for her to grow a healthy baby. But in North America, the fact that you are [shock] gaining weight as you grow another human being inside of your body gives people the right to make completely inappropriate comments under the guise of "making conversation".

So, let's just be clear - to the next person who makes a weight comment to me, our conversation will go something like this:

Person: "So-and-so only gained X number of pounds in her pregnancy." (Inference: Katrina, you are getting really really big and fat.*)

Me: "Well that's good, because I hear if you get too fat, they don't let you keep the baby."

Also while we are on the topic of people saying things they shouldn't, while it is okay for me to joke about the fact that I am a bit hormonal, it is not okay for you to joke about it, or joke about the fact that I joke about it. Got it? /rant.

*I am actually on track to gain exactly the right amount of weight to deliver a healthy baby, so shut the fuck up.

O RLY? QUITE RLY!

One thing I never seem to learn is that booking every spare moment of my weekend is not a good idea. I always think that "ah, it's no big deal, it'll be fun", but really, the weekend requires that at least one day be an empty sacred day of do-nothingness. If you don't get at least that one day, then you end up exhausted on Monday morning, feeling more tired than you were on Friday night. Not an ideal way to start the work week.

That's not to say we didn't have a good time this weekend. We got in a birthday dinner on Friday night and a brunch on Sunday morning with Scott's family, dinner with Jen and Brad and 8-week old baby Maya on Saturday, and we also put together a small last minute gathering for Superbowl on Sunday night. It was great to catch up with Shane and Stephanie and their 10 month old daughter Charlotte. Also in attendance were Cathy and Alex, who always add to a good time. Scott served up a mess of wings, pizza, chips/dip and I made the ever popular Skor cookies. They all drank beer, I drank...milk. Have I mentioned I am REALLY looking forward to being able to enjoy a nice glass of wine once this baby of mine is born?

The Superbowl was typical in that the actual game is never really all that good. Shane agreed with me that the Indianapolis/Pittsburgh game leading up to the Superbowl was much more exciting. The half time show with the Rolling Stones was crap - I miss Janet Jackson and her bejewelled ta-tas. I can't believe the powers that be beeped out the word "cock" from the song "Rough Justice" (One time you were my baby chicken / Now you've grown into a fox / Once upon a time I was your little rooster / But am I just one of your cocks). Jessica Simpson can strut around half naked trying to seduce a teenage boy, but a they won't let an old geezer like Mick Jagger say the world "cock"? Whatevs.

In other news, I have noticed that people say the damnedest things to you when you are noticeably pregnant. Some comments are welcome, some are meant in jest (but still sting), and some are just inappropriate or downright rude/mean-spirited.

A few examples from this past week:
Nicest thing someone said to me: "Look at your belly - you look fabulous!" (thanks Stephanie)
Meanest thing someone said to me: "Hey Kat, you're getting really fat!" (thanks Alex...you big jerk)
Most inappropriate question asked: "So, are your boobs getting really big?") (thanks pseudo-dad, you friggin' weirdo)

And if you can believe it, those are just the tip of the iceberg QUITE RLY!.

I am a cranky cranky be-atch.

There, I said it. 12 weeks to go, and cranky preggo fever has taken full force. Seriously, if you can please me, you should win a prize as I am a humourless, hyper-emotional, bloated, breeding be-atch. Between almost breaking down in tears at my doctor's office (what DO YOU MEAN you can't do my gestational diabetes test here?!!) and scowling at the sales lady at Thyme Maternity for telling me my breasts "weren't THAT big" (yes but they weigh about 10 pounds each), I am a real treat. Poor Scott. He took this picture of me at Alana's birthday party on Saturday and I tearfully accused him of not only of lacking any photography skills whatsoever, but also suggested that he should KNOW BETTER than to take a picture of me from the side. So, no more pictures of the fat pregnant lady with multiple chins. Unless I get to select my "best side" which is likely when I am standing behind something larger than me (like an NFL linebacker or my fridge).
Anyway, I did manage to muster up some smiles for dear Alana's belated 25th birthday party on Saturday. I conned Adam, Marcy and Alana into coming to Oakville (I don't travel well with the constant need to pee) for the evening. I sweet talked Scott into making his killer lasagne, volun-told Adam to provide appetizers, and even got Alana to bring a salad (to her own birthday party nonetheless!). I am good, eh? I did actually contribute something - I made her a birthday cake from scratch. This is the first birthday cake I have EVER made from scratch (I always thought that a store bought cake or mix was just as good). Apparently I was dead wrong - while homemade may not be as pretty, it does in fact taste much better. I used this Carrot Cake recipe from Canadian Living - the only change I made was to make it a layer cake so I decreased the time to 28 minutes and increased the icing by 50%.

A few news updates:
1. If you think that 2006 is the year of the Dog, you are wrong. 2006 is the year of the baby. Please welcome Domestic Goddess & TilaBC to the group of impending mommies. Babies are the new Pink!

The watch list now includes:
Melanoma Uberalis
Domestic Goddess
Daymented
TilaBC/What Have I Done?

Anyone want to take bets on who is next? Through My Lens is turning 30 and has been making baby noises recently... Dooce has even made a few suspicious comments...guess only time will tell. 2. Bossa is now fully on the road to recovery (seen here making sweet sweet love to Marcy's purse). She is now a svelte 10.5 pounds, feeling much better, and no longer peeing outside her litter box or wiping her shit ass on our carpet (much to Scott's relief). Good thing, because we are out of money. Put it this way - we spent so much on her this past month that the vet sent us a "certificate of appreciation for taking such good care of Bossa". The fine print reads "and for paying my mortgage this month". It's not like we are trying to save our money or anything. Sigh.

My ass is gone.

Much to my dismay, I have fallen victim to "pregnant-lady-flat-butt" syndrome. Seriously, my ass is gone. I'm not really sure where it went either. It used to be a nice apple bottom, not too big, not too small, with a nice curve. But it is gone, and I am sad. Maybe it has reincarnated itself in the form of our new Prime Minister. That's got to be it. Though my ass was firmer and more useful than this doughy zealot we now call our leader. Admittedly, both have been known to be full of shit. By the way, I'm not saying my ass was as fine as the fine lady's ass in this picture (Scott wishes). But it does illustrate my point while offering you some eye candy.

It seems that the majority of my blogger friends are tremendously unhappy with the election results. I think they could have been far worse and there were some interesting outcomes. Notably, the NDP picked up some seats, Olivia Chow won in Trinity-Spadina (go Olivia!), Belinda Stronach retained her seat in Aurora, and Montreal, Toronto and Vancouver wisely blocked the Conservatives from even winning one seat in the biggest cities in Canada. How you like that Stevo? Not one of the major urban centres in Canada supports you.

This brings me to another point - the name Steve. Hope this doesn't offend anyone, but I don't think I've ever met a Steve I could trust. They have all had that used car salesmen thing going for them. That's just my personal experience mind you, and our new PM only helps me build my case. I can't stand him, he makes my skin crawl. I doubt we'll have to deal with him for more than a couple of years and hopefully he isn't able to take back same sex marriage while he is in office. As a new-mom-to-be I sure am happy about that $100 a month though - that's going to go really far towards my $800+ monthly daycare costs. Heck, maybe I should just quit my job and stay home and pop out a bunch of kids. $100 is sure a strong incentive. Not.

Is January the longest month of the year or what?

I feel like I have been checking off the days of January on my calendar for months. Seriously, the last three weeks have dragged by...and by the looks of it, there are 2 more weeks of this! Maybe it 's just that the days in general seem to be moving at a snail's pace, and with me starting to really feel uncomfortable in my own body, the minutes feel like hours...the hours go so slowly...you get the picture.

Also, I am getting old. Last weekend I watched "Hustle & Flow" and I kept thinking "my goodness, this movie is rough!". And really, it isn't that bad. I've see rougher. For some reason, this movie about a pimp and his hookers, it just didn't sit well with me. Especially the part where he makes one of his girls have sex with an electronics store owner so he can get a free microphone to record his demo. Not cool dude. The main character D-Jay was really hard to like or root for, maybe that was the main problem? Scott and I also watched "Broken Flowers". Love Bill Murray, not sure what I thought of the lack of resolution at the end of the movie. Guess that's life. Yep, I'm definitely getting old. Need more proof? I watch "Commander and Chief" every week and I LIKE it (though I dropped "West Wing" as a result).

Baby Update:
I decided that my last day of work is going to be April 12th (assuming I can make it that long without taking a vacation day). With the little guy due on April 25th, that should give me some time to get ready for him. That's assuming he doesn't come early (though my gut is telling me that he will be late - just like his dad - if anything). Yesterday, for the first time, I felt him get the hiccups. He got them again today. I think that both times, I had just eaten an orange. I'll have to watch out tomorrow to see if the consumption of oranges induces hiccups. Too funny. Good news is that the nursery furniture is ordered, the bedding is ordered, and the Penguin picture we ordered last week has arrived. One more thing - the "hotsling" (highly recommended by Stephanie) arrived as well. This little guy is already getting spoiled.

Baby Blog: 26 weeks and counting.

Goodbye second trimester, hello tired legs, swollen feet, sore back, and all of the other wonderful parts of the final 14 weeks of pregnancy. This weekend I asked Scott to help roll me out of bed. Pride has been placed firmly on the backburner. My wedding band no longer fits my swollen fingers so I look like a single woman. A knocked up single woman...I'm sure the fellas will be lining up for my phone number.

Good news is that Scott and I finished up the baby registry this past weekend. Stephanie was kind enough to look at it for me and give me the rundown on things that I should add (fun baby toys!), things that I really don't need (baby food warmer), and things she will lend us (baby swing, baby bumble seat). I figured a new mom like her would be a good person to ask as it is fresh in her mind and I figured right. We tested out a stroller to make sure that I can open and close it with one hand (check) and that the baby seat rocks when placed on the floor (check). We also finally settled on the nursery bedding, and it looks like if we have a theme, the theme is monkeys. Somewhat appropriate if you know Scott. The little guy has taken up World Cup Soccer practice in my belly - practices start at 11pm every night, in case you wanted to attend. It really is quite a spectacle, my belly lurches from side to side. I am actually reduced to "navel gazing" as I see him kick and roll around. I also managed to start clearing out the nursery (formally the empty "storage/junk" room). I made a good dent in it...more work still to come once I figure out where to put the stuff that I didn't throw out.
I was emailing with my friend Lulu this morning and I said that I can already tell that the baby is going to take after Scott. Hence my prediction that he will be born after his due date and he will be a total night owl. She said that she has noticed a trend where the first born is a lot like the father. She is a first born and she said that the older she gets, the more she realizes she is like her dad (who, turns out, "is a cool dude so it's all good"). I am not at all like my birth father, so I don't share in this experience. Just wondering if anyone else has noticed this trend? I expect our son will be a ball of energy, be smarter than his own good, have a bit of a mouth on him, and will give me a run for my money every chance he gets. Just like his dad. And Scott's folks will sit back and laugh their asses off, because they will know exactly what we are going through, having already been through it.

New law: Staple a biscotti to your jacket.

I don't much like talking politics on my blog, or in general, but I gotta say, this upcoming election has me torn. I'm going to vote, because not voting is just unacceptable. I was going to just vote based on the party, but I thought I should at least know what the candidates in Halton look like before I cast my ballot. Last election I voted Liberal, and that was mostly because the idea of Stephen Harper being Prime Minister and all the things that come with that scare the shit out of me. While I probably lean more to the left and would vote NDP in any other riding, living in Oakville, I knew there was a significant risk that the riding could go Conservative. So Liberal it was. I hated the fact that I was "voting strategically" but I did it anyway.

Little did I know that our Liberal MP Gary Carr would vote against same sex marriage. Mother fucker! So now I can't vote for him this time around. Just can't do it. And I sure as hell will not be voting for the Conservative candidate Garth Turner. So NDP it is. Anwar Naqvi, you have my vote, even if it means that I am helping Garth Turner win the riding. And for the record, I know that Garth Turner voted for same sex marriage, but I still cannot vote for the Conservatives. Not going to happen.

I know that many people have decided that they "don't support this election" so therefore they are not voting. And that is just dumb. Unless you are leaning towards voting for the Conservatives - then you can feel free to stay home. Just kidding! But for realz yo, get your ass off your couch and go vote. And for gawdsake, do a bit of research before you make up your mind. Deciding to vote Conservative just because "the Liberals have been in power for a long time, let's try someone new" is not a good enough reason to vote Conservative.

Someone told me the other day that they don't vote because they don't understand the issues and they just don't care to understand politics. I asked her if there was any issue that would be important enough to her that would get her to vote, and she looked at me blankly. So I gave some examples "for instance, if a woman's right to choose to have an abortion was at risk, would that inspire you to vote? How about if your right to choose who you wanted to marry was at risk? Or your day-to-day safety was put in jeopardy because the potential new leadership of this country is seriously considering getting fully in bed with a country who's policies invite terrorism upon themselves? Would that be enough?". She didn't get it. I secretly began to wonder if there was a new law forcing all Italians to staple a biscotti to their jacket to identify themselves, would that be enough to motivate her to vote? Probably not. But it was quite an image...this beautiful non-voting Italian woman with a piece of stale almond biscotti crumbling all over her jacket.

GO VOTE ON JANUARY 23RD!

The Patrick Dempsey scruffy factor.

Anyone else tired of all of the reruns/recaps/rehash of television shows over the holidays? Me too. I mean, why do the holidays have to interrupt my favourite television shows? Seems unfair to me, but that's not a battle I'm going to win. Since I am just about at my wits end with this tv dryspell, I decided to watch the Grey's Anatomy seasons one and two recap. I think this effort to get viewers up to speed is for their upcoming Super Bowl show (they get the time honoured Survivor spot following the big game). I didn't learn anything new about the show, but I did notice that Patrick Dempsey got increasingly sex-ay from season 1 to now. I was a bit tired, so I had a hard time pinpointing it. And then it came to me. The scruffy factor.

Scott - please stop reading now as this does not apply to you (I prefer the man I kiss to be clean shaven). To prove my point, I found a few pics of our man Patrick in various states of scruffiness. You can't really deny it. Early on in the show he was clean shaven with short hair. As his hair gets a little curlier and his 5'o-clock shadow takes over, so does he hawt factor. Also, when he is a bit stressed out with the whole living-a-lie-by-staying-with-Madison-when-he-lurves-scrawny-Meredith, he is pretty raw....and jumpable. Hey, I'm pregnant, not dead. And besides that, the 2nd trimester, it's a good time for these types of hormone-driven-lusty thoughts. At 25 weeks I have to embrace these feelings as I will soon be switching to beached whale mode.

What I want to see in the coming weeks...I need some Derek/Meredith action. I mean, he was a good guy, he tried to make it work with Madison, but there is no chemistry there. He needs to maybe start cheating on her with Meredith. Or just end it already and move on. We can't expect Kristina and Preston to keep us all satisfied for the rest of the season.

Unrelated ER note: Yeah! Abby and Luka are going to have a baby! Talk about good looking genes - woot!

Baby Blog: The honeymoon is over.

While it may be 2 more weeks until the 3rd trimester starts, let me tell you, the 2nd trimester honeymoon that you hear about? It's over. See, the theory is that the 2nd trimester is the fun time, when you no longer feel exhausted/nauseous/bloated and you aren't yet huge/sore/unable to sleep. After buying 3 pairs of "larger" pants this week, waking up every half hour because my hips ache, a new found love of all things tums/gaviscon/zantac, and my ever sexy strut/waddle I can honestly say that I am a bit worried about the next 16 weeks. I mean, it's not going to get any better until the little guy is born. In fact, it's going to get worse.

Scott has been a trooper. Over the holidays my crankiness increased 10-fold, culminating with me in tears at 4pm on Christmas day telling him "I haven't sat down since we got home and I am exhausted!". He steered me towards bed and told me to take a nap and not to worry. So I did. The other day he asked me "did you ever imagine it would be this hard?" and I told him "it's something that people tell you and you nod and think you get it because you are so focused on the end result of having a baby." But you can't possibly understand just how hard it really is until you are in it. The thing that has been really tough this week (besides coming back to work after being off for over a week) is that I wake up tired and worn out. My bones are tired. My brain is fuzzy. And I can't have any coffee to pull it all together. I also miss diet coke. A lot. I'm not proud.

Aside from all of my physical complaints, I am getting excited about the arrival of our little guy. I am going to order the nursery furniture this weekend. His room is painted, so we just need to empty it out, put some child safe blinds up and get the carpets cleaned. I even set up a baby registry at babiesrus.ca. There has been some disagreement on the theme of the room. I would like to do "lambs" and Scott, while he has no suggestions, is saying "no lambs!". His theory is that they won't have much staying power. I know, doesn't make much sense to me either, I mean, once the kid is 2 or so he will be moving into a big boy room and will be able to choose his own decorating, or at least help select between trains/planes/whatever it is that little boys like. Anyway, suggestions are welcome. I don't want anything macho though, so monster trucks are out!

Pee in my face (and tell me that you love me).

What a busy busy week it has been (not that the lead up to it wasn't also harried and hectic). I feel like after 2 days of hibernating with Scott I am just starting to recover. So first off, we had an awesome Christmas. My folks arrived on the 22nd and it was pretty much go-go-go right up to when they departed on the 28th. I was totally spoiled rotten this year (could be this little munchkin growing in my belly is earning me some preferential treatment). This really was the year of the "accessory" (one would be pretty daring to buy me clothes that I didn't pick out). I got a watch, several beautiful necklaces (to keep the focus on my face and not my burgeoning belly), and my most favourite gift of all, a pair of pearl earrings from Scott. He really is a keeper ladies.

The best part of Christmas really was having my folks here. Living in Toronto is great and all, but I really feel it during the holidays. I think it is the customs we are used to, and when they aren't there, and your folks aren't there, it just isn't the same. Christmas is a HUGE deal to me, it always has been (I must get this from my mom). I go all out, baking, decorating, trying to come up with the most thoughtful gifts, wrapping presents so they look almost too nice to open...I live for this stuff. And yes, I have been called "Martha Stewart" on several occasions, and I wear that nickname with pride. A big shout out has to go out to my mom who pretty much handled Christmas dinner on her own (I chopped up stuff, washed dishes, and set the table which she said was a big help, but who are we kidding?). Her sausage stuffing and Southern Comfort sweet potatoes were big hits and Scott deserves props for his killer mashed potatoes. The $60 turkey is still being put to good use as Scott and I made turkey soup a few nights ago (for $60 we want that turkey to go far).

Tonight we are spending a low key New Year's Eve with our friends Jen and Brad and their just short of 4 weeks old baby girl Maya. I think there will be another couple there who are also expecting, so I won't be the only preggo person not drinking. Funny how now that we are 30 a lot of our friends have moved to this next stage with us. I knew it would happen, I just wasn't able to picture it. I don't have any new year's resolutions this year because they typically focus on trying to lose weight and that just isn't going to happen in the next little while. This next year is going to be full of enough challenges/surprises/delights without adding any extra pressure of a resolution, that's for sure.

Bossa Update: Stoner cat is doing just fine, though contrary to what the vet told us, the valium has not made her any nicer (she still looks for ways to sneak onto the 2nd floor to kill Samba). Sigh. I doubt that will ever change. Though she has stopped peeing in inappropriate places, and her pee doesn't stink nearly so bad. She is fully converted onto wet food as well, and her coat is much nicer for it. She has to stay on the valium until the 6th when we will take her to the vet again to get retested. Then we get to ween her off the drugs slowly so she doesn't come down too hard from her high. That's just what I need...I detoxing kitty.

A few of the wonderful gifts I got:
Pee-pee Teepees for our little boy (to avoid the whole face peeing thing)
Pizzelle Press (still working on mastering this)
Heated Throw Blanket (because you can never be too cozy)
So Doku book (I am truly addicted)
Kanye West's latest
Coldplay's latest (aka "Music For Bedwetters according to Scott")

Couldn't we all use a little valium this time of year?

My cat Bossa is on valium. And assorted other medications to clear up a urinary tract infection and crystals in her urine. Apparently she is a little stressed out, so the vet felt it would be a good idea to help her calm down a bit to aid in her recovery. This seems unfair to me. I mean, I have never had that chance to take valium, and I've heard it's a wonderful drug! Ah well, Bossa has such a rough life, sleeping on our heating vent all day, looking for new and creative places to piss, I am sure she needs it. It is pretty funny to see her once the "happy drug" has kicked in, she really does look stoned. If she could smile, I think she would have a slightly bemused expression on her face. The holidays are a stressful time, so if she needs a little help to get through the next few weeks, then more power to her. This will be my first Christmas in years that I will not be able to drink/self-medicate, so I am wondering how I am going to hold up? What do you mean I can't spike my coffee Christmas morning?? And no wine with dinner to numb me to the yearly ritual of Scott and his brother claiming the turkey legs for themselves? Lord help me and Lord help you too!

Anyway, I am pretty much ready for the big day. My house is decorated and clean, shopping complete, gifts are wrapped, baking is done, cards long gone, errands run, so now the festivities can start. My folks arrive tonight and Scott and I are very excited to get to share Christmas with them on the actual holiday - the first time in seven years! It will be fun to see how our collective families mix with our different traditions. Scott and I are hosting Christmas dinner this year, for the first time ever, giving his mom a break from having to put a big meal on Christmas day. Luckily my mom will be here to steer the ship, otherwise I would be FREAKING OUT. She does make a kickass Christmas dinner (her sausage stuffing is famous in 50 states), so I am hoping mine will be 1/10th as good as hers.

The little guy has really gained strength this week, and is kicking up a storm (his favourite times are right after dinner and at bedtime). It really is a trip, having a human being growing inside you. The book I am reading says that at 22 weeks he is 8 inches long from crown to rump and weighs just over a pound. A pound? So, umm...what about this other 13 pounds? What is all that? No wonder I grunt like an old man when I get up and down, it's because I'm actually the size of a pie wagon. Gah! I think I am still getting used to the fact that I am not the slender young thing I used to be. Yesterday at the grocery store I tried to ease my way between two shopping carts and I got stuck. The lady next to me gave me a funny look, but smiled when I explained that I am 5 months pregnant and I have apparently not accepted my new found girth. In other news, I got my first unsolicited belly tap this week. An odd thing really, having someone you barely know reach out and touch your tummy. All this and it's my CAT WHO GETS THE VALIUM?? So unfair.

Christmas Blog #3/Belly Blog #1.

Well, we're in the home stretch - only 9 days until Christmas! I am pretty much done my shopping, except for a few little loose ends that I'll probably ask Scott to take care of (I'm using my "P" card this year, so far it has been good for several "please pick XYZ's" and a free pass on shovelling the snow). Next on the list is to get my wrapping done and to finish up the last of my baking. I have a deep freezer full of cookies just waiting to be inhaled, and with all of the trades I have done this year, the selection is unbelievable. Seriously, if you have a sweet tooth, you would do well to stop by our house.

Melanie over at Melanoma Uberalis (who is having twins!) has been posting belly shots of her progress and while I am bit shy about my belly, I thought I would post a pic of my progress to date. This pink turtleneck is fairly fitted, so it shows my tummy off nicely. And I'm only 21 weeks! I can't even imagine how big I'm going to be by the end of this journey. The little guy has been making himself known this week with lots of kicks and nudges. Seems like his most active times are when I am sitting still and he settles down with I am on the move. I can already tell that he is going to be just like his dad. Goodness.

4a.m. and I can't sleep.

It seems that the 5-month insomnia has officially kicked in. I woke up at 4a.m. this morning and here I am wide awake, and ready to go. I guess this is Mother Nature's way of getting me ready for months of no sleep. Also, it seems that between quilting, baking and growing a child inside me, pretty much all my creativity has been sapped out of my body, so apologies for the lack of posts - my blogging muse has deserted me as of late.

Scott and I went over and visited with our friend's Brad and Jen and their fresh! new! pink! babysmelling! baby Maya Jennifer! Here is a picture of me hogging her all to myself:
A few months ago Brad emailed me pictures of Maya's nursery, so I quickly hussled my butt to the local fabric store and started on a quilt. I gotta say, I am very proud of this quilt - it turned out exactly as I had envisioned, and I made a pillow to boot! Let me show off a bit:
Okay, enough of that. Did I mention it matches her nursery perfectly???

I would remiss if I did not mention how pleased I was with Sunday night's Grey's Anatomy. I LOVE that Christina is Jewish, and even more so, I am very pleased to see the plot line moving towards a Merinda and Derek reconciliation. HAH! Madison's(TM) face with Derek was all "Just because I decide to be with you doesn't mean I don't love her". Friggin' ouch dude! Now, that's honesty. Seriously, this show gets me through the Sunday-night-gotta-go-back-to-work-blues.

Baby Blog: 20 Weeks & Half Way There.

I'm about to spill the beans on the whole boy/girl news so if you are one of those people that doesn't like to know these things before the big day, please avert your eyes.

We went for the 19 week ultrasound on Friday and (drum roll please) according to one ultrasound technician and two doctors, we have a beautiful bouncing baby BOY on the way. Funny, everyone was saying girl, but I had a feeling we were having a boy. Mother's instinct, I guess! Our little guys "equipment" got pointed out to us, but to be honest, I felt like Rachel on "Friends" where she nods and smiles and says that yes she can see everything and then bursts into tears and admits she actually sees nothing. I didn't cry, and I wasn't upset, but I have to say, outside of the baby's head, hands and legs, I had a hard time figuring out what exactly I was looking at. Scott guarantees that his son is "packing" though, and well, I guess that's that. To make matters complicated, our little guy would not stay still, and he was not staying in any kind of an ideal position for the tech to take her measurements. Ah well, I can already see that he is taking after his dad (stubborn!). Which means he'll also be late, so I can make plans after my due date with no worries.

Though Scott says he would have been happy either way, I think he is secretly thrilled that he is going to have a son. While the clothes may not be quite as cute as the sea of pink girl outfits, I think that boys definitely get better toys. Now that we know I can make some decisions about his room, which is already painted green (which is how it will stay). I'm not sure what kind of colour scheme I'll go with, but I know I'll stay away from any kind of Disney theme. Maybe trains, or lambs...we're half way there so I better make up my mind. Belly shots to come...

Christmas Blog #2.

Daymented is having a baby!

Adrianne got a new kitty! (Yet to be named)

Christmas preparations are now in full swing. Our tree arrived last night, along with the Diana Krall Christmas CD (doesn't she look totally uncomfortable in that picture?) and Nightmare Before Christmas DVD I ordered. I am on track with my baking (Skor Chocolate Chip Cookies - check, Cranberry White Chocolate Shortbread - check). Pinwheel cookies are on board for this Saturday and Christmas lights and Christmas tree decoration are scheduled for Sunday. Note, I have promised Scott his favourite eggnog (spiked with rye) from Beckers to gain his commitment to participate. Hopefully he gets the lights up on the house before he gets too much into the cups.

The Christmas social calendar has officially kicked off with Adam D's fabulous dinner party and Joe & Kevin's Annual Shake & Bake already put to bed. The next two weekends are also booked up with a visit to see Charlotte (and Stephanie & Shane), a day of Christmas baking with my friend Christine, and yet another Christmas Party. I think we have a few spare Saturdays/Sundays before Christmas, but I have a feeling they will get booked up before I know it. All that and I still have Christmas cards to write, a few gifts left to buy, and 2 major projects on the go. Goodness...and I'm working on a baby!

Speaking of which - I have my 19 week ultrasound on Friday. Hopefully our baby will cooperate and we will be able to find out if we are having a boy or a girl. I know that some people want to wait for the big "surprise" when their baby is born, but I figure we will be "surprised" whenever we find out, whether it's at 19 weeks or 40 weeks. Plus, then we can actually buy stuff for the baby that isn't all green/yellow/and white. Scott, who lovingly refers to our baby as "RaptorBaby" seems to leaning towards a boy, Jennifer and Alana are voting girl. The last day or so, I have been thinking boy, but I guess we'll know for sure in 2 days.

Christmas Blog #1

The "Joys" of Being Preggo.

The other night Jennifer and I were chatting on the phone and the topic of being pregnant came up. It's interesting really, how different people think about their own pregnancies and the pregnancies of others. Take me for example. I was very excited and there were a few key people that I told the moment I found out I was "in the family way". Mainly my mom and my friend Jennifer. See, they both knew how important this was to me and they were both really excited. We let a few other friends know early on, but then we zipped our mouths shut about it and waited until we got past the 12 week mark to share our news. When we did tell people, it wasn't that big a deal. We waited until we happened to be talking with people on the phone, or when we saw our friends. But, really, while the fact that we are having a kid is interesting news, it doesn't change anyone else's lives. We knew that and didn't make a huge deal about it. I've experienced the other side of it though, the huge "secrecy" of it all, the pecking order of who can be "in the know" and who needs to be "kept in the dark". Sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me. Billions of women have had babies before me and billions of women will have them after me. While it's awesome and beautiful and scary as hell, it isn't really all that spectacular. In fact, as I ran down the glorious list of pregnancy symptoms, I had Jennifer in stitches.

For your interest, here are the facts:

Skin/Hair:
- That pregnancy glow that people talk about, it is more of a flush and you are flushed because you are always boiling hot and sweaty
- You break out like a teenager, you get nose bleeds that would make special effects departments proud
- Your hair gets weird and funky on you, some days it is limp, some days it goes hay wire

Sickness:
- From the minute you find out your are pregnant until about 12 weeks, you feel pretty much like you want to die (it feels like it will never ever end)
- You dry heave every time your brush your teeth (this lasts the entire pregnancy), your dental hygienist gives you the gears for not flossing more (bitch!)

Eating:
- You have to eat at least every two hours, and if you don't you get dizzy and feel like you are going to pass out
- When you need to eat, you need to eat NOW
- Things that you used to love to eat are completely unappealing (example - Thai food)
- Things that used to smell good now smell like urine

Bathroom:
- The constant peeing is a real pain and time sucker, I swear I have a reserve bladder that is always full
- For the first time in your life, you can out-fart any male you know and your farts will smell so bad that your cat may bite you out of disgust
- When you manage to "go #2" you feel like you want to sing to the heavens in appreciation. You are so excited, you may or may not mention it to your spouse

Belly:
- At some point in the 2nd trimester, your stomach muscles give up the ghost. Then you need your husband/partner/whoever to push you out of bed, lest you end up stuck there flailing your arms and legs like a turtle
- Your waist line gets wider by the day and you swear if you get any wider you will in fact be mistaken for a pie wagon

Boobs:
- Your boobs, at first they hurt like they have NEVER hurt before, and they get about 2 cups sizes bigger, almost immediately. Then they get hard as rocks, like you had a boob job, except they aren't nearly as perky as they would be if you had a boob job (more like torpedoes shooting at your belly button)

Sleep:
- Getting up 2 - 3 times a night to pee, really messes up the whole sleep thing
- 9pm is your new bedtime, you can't imagine how you used to stay up to watch Saturday Night Live

General Life skills:
- You become the klutziest person on the face of the earth (breaking dishes, dropping the cat food container in mid air, knocking random potted plants over)
- You can't remember basic things, your husband/partner will use this to play tricks on you

And those are just the things I have experienced so far, I still have 22 more weeks to go! Now, don't think that I am complaining, these are mere observations and comments. I mostly take them with a grain of salt and a lot of laughter. I am thrilled to be having a baby. But anyone who tells you how wonderful it is to be pregnant, and how "great" they feel, they are either lying or insane (though the 2nd trimester is MUCH better than the first). The end result is worth it, but while you are in it, you wonder what the hell you were thinking.

Is this turkey dry, or is it just me?

I don't know about the rest of you Grey's Anatomy watchers, but I've been struggling ever since Derek and Meredith broke up. It isn't that I like Meredith all that much, but I liked "them". I liked their chemistry, their "steam", the fact that their romance was secret and wrong in that "work place romances are bad and never end well" kind of way. Remember when he bought glow in the dark condoms? See, that was hawt. But now we are left with what? Derek looking all unhappy with his decision to give Madison another try, and Meredith sulking around the hospital. I just don't buy the whole Derek and Madison getting back together storyline. I'm not feeling it. As of last night it looked like they were about to give new meaning to "Thanksgiving" by getting it on in his trailer, and to that I say, "whatever". Seriously, I feel no passion there. Kind of a token gesture on Derek's part, a pity fuck, if you will. He really should be with Meredith.

Maybe the big show that is going to air after Superbowl will give us what we want, because I know I am not the only one who wants to boo and hiss at the screen when Madison comes on. Even better - how about a Christmas or New Year's reconciliation where Madison gets on a plane (or a broomstick) and flies her ass home to New York (for good), while Derek and Meredith smooch under the mistle toe or as the clock strikes 12? Yeah! ABC - you listenin'? As for Madison, I'm not sure why I don't like her, probably because I spent last season rooting for Meredith and lusting after Derek's fine self. I mean, as a married woman, you'd think I'd be supportive of Derek going back to his wife/giving it a shot, but, ummm...not so much.

I'm hoping that Cristina and Preston (woot!) keep the romance (sex) going as we can't count on the rest of them to fulfill our needs. Not sure what I think of Izzie and Alex, that is still tbd in my mind, though I know that my friend Adam wouldn't mind if Izzie got a little more screen time. Okay, enough talk about good looking people getting it on...you guys must think this is all I think about...

Christmas Blog #1.

You may think it is early to start blogging (or even thinking) about Christmas, but then, you aren't me. Spending this past weekend in Ottawa with Jennifer has me inspired to get going on things like my Christmas baking (which will commence this Saturday) and at the very least, start figuring out what I am going to get people. Truth be told, I started my shopping back in October, and I have already purchased quite a few new ornaments for our tree. This year we are getting a new pre-lit tree (note - putting lights on Christmas trees will potentially end even the strongest of marriages). That is why the PRE-LIT option is the one for me.

Last year's lighting of the tree was the final straw. Poor Scott was doing his best to follow my instructions, but I am a difficult taskmaster, and he could not seem to please me. We muddled through it, but afterwards I could tell he could do without experiencing the lighting of the tree again. And really, the truly fun part is putting the decorations on, not getting the darn thing out of the closet and assembling it. Some of you may applaud my use of a fake tree while others may be dismayed. I don't like cleaning up the needles and with a cat like Bossa who enjoys pissing on things, I really don't want to encourage her to mark her territory or drink from the tree stand water. Lol. Scott just emailed me in dismay at my tree selection (Scott: "$260! I hope I get a bonus this year!"). I didn't even pick the most expensive one there for goodness' sake.

Onto baking. For the next 4-6 weeks I will bake a different type of cookie on each Saturday. I freeze them right after baking so they stay fresh, then thaw them out as need be in December. I have sent out a few emails soliciting cookie exchanges in hopes of having an über fantastic selection that will rival what I did last year. I am planning to bake:

Cranberry White Chocolate Shortbread
Gingerbread Cookies
Orange Spice Sugar Cookies
Chocolate Vanilla Pinwheel Cookies
Skor Chocolate Chip Cookies
Pizzelles
Cranberry Almond Bark

Hopefully I will be able to get someone else to do gingerbread for me. I don't seem to be very good at applying icing (last year's batch tasted good but looked like a 2-year-old had decorated them). Sigh. You can't be good at everything! I also need to get some bars in there (nanaimo, fudge, butterscotch?) to mix it up a bit. For some people Christmas is about the presents, for me it is much more about family and food. This year the stress will be even more so on family and food as I will be having a dry Christmas. No happy hours for me this year - a great deal for Scott, who will no doubt enjoy all of the parties we go to more than I will.

Last Year's Christmas Blogs:
Xmas Blog #1 | #2 | #3 | #4 | #5 | #6 | #7 | #8 | #9 | #10

The one night stand.

One thing that people don't tell you about being pregnant is that it is hard to sleep, mostly because you just can't get comfortable. Oh yeah, and the getting up 3 times a night to pee, that doesn't help either. For someone who has always been a stomach sleeper, this whole thing has been a challenge to say the least. After weeks of complaining, Scott bought me a body pillow to ease my pain. It's basically a super long pillow that you can cuddle up to and drape your leg over.

What's funny, is that it takes up a fair amount of space in bed, like about the size of another human adult. The first night of the body pillow commenced with Scott getting ready for bed, seeing the pillow (already tucked under the covers) and commenting "is there going to be room for me in there?". Once we both got into bed, I thought to myself, this is probably what a threesome is like, except without the flannel pyjamas and a lot more sex. Too bad for Scott, this is the closest he'll ever get.

I told Jennifer about out tight sleeping quarters and she said that one of her friends has a body pillow, which he has nicknamed "the one night stand". Somehow fitting, as when I came back to bed from one of many trips to the bathroom last night, there was Scott, embracing MY pillow. I strong armed it away from him, inserting myself between him and the pillow. Apparently I am a jealous and possessive woman. Later that night I woke up and Samba (aka "the princess and the pea") was on top of the pillow, attempting to nudge me away from it so that she could have it all for herself. It seems that there is much competition for my pillow. Since there is only room for one pillow, Scott and Samba are going to have to back off as the pregnant lady gets dibs.

Taking All Bets.

Ah damn. Somehow my blogiversary totally slipped by me...I'm going to blame it on the pregnancy brain. My mind seems to be doing an incredible impression of a sieve as of late. Seriously, I am able to forget anything and everything. It's actually rather impressive, and I thoroughly enjoy having something to blame it on. It should be noted that Scott told me that one year of blogging really isn't a big deal and likely not worthy of celebration. This from the father of my future child. Nice, eh? I guess I understand as he has now been blogging for 3+ years (check out his new design!). It should also be noted that the very moment he started blogging about the Raptors they completely went into the toilet. Raptorblog curse or just a coincidence? Only time will tell...

Tomorrow morning Scott and I have our first appointment with the baby doctor. I think it is a pretty routine visit (weigh-in, blood pressure, etc). My obgyn is a woman, so that's kind of cool. The best part is that she will hopefully schedule my "big" ultrasound sometime in the next 2-3 weeks where we will find out if we have a Scott Junior or a Kat Junior. I have no "motherly instinct" on this. Seriously, no idea. But I'm taking bets. So far Alana and DAM are on the girl side, and Jennifer has jokingly referred to her "nephews" (though we know there is only one bambino on board). I have been told of one grandparent's preference for a girl (no pressure) and Scott told me this morning that he thought it would be kind of awesome if we had a boy. Me, I'll be happy with a healthy baby, regardless of its "equipment".

As a complete aside, I have to say that my favourite new show is Grey's Anatomy. It is like ER meets the evening soaps. Patrick Dempsey is sex on a stick, Sandra Oh is too awesome for words, Ellen Pompeo has you rooting for her, even though she is a little too cute for my liking, and Isaiah Washington is so stern and sexy and hawt, goodness, I'd risk my career for him too! The only problem is that it is on at 10pm on Sunday nights which is past my bedtime. But I can't resist the pull, so I stay up anyway and then have dreams full of sexy doctors in their scrubs talking clever to each other. McDreamy indeed.

And baby makes three.

If you are wondering "why the lack of regular blog posts over at ficklefeline as of late?" I can now answer your question openly and honestly. Yep, you got it, I'm up the stump/preggers/expecting/in the family way/knocked up/with child/etc. The reason for not posting about it here until now? Well, I only just told my place of employment, and I wanted to make sure they found out from me and not anyone else. Also, I have been extremely tired and dealing with typical first trimester sickness since the beginning of September. But don't worry, I'm not sick anymore, still tired though (I sleep so much it should be considered a sport).

Hmmm...what other details can I share with you? Due date - end of April (between Scott and my birthdays which are April 23rd and 30th respectively). Projected zodiac sign - Taurus (that will make 3 hard headed bulls under one roof). Sex of baby - dunno, but we will hopefully be able to find out sometime in December. Best part so far - all of the positive reactions we have gotten from all of our family and friends, and seeing the baby kicking up a storm at the 12 week ultrasound (we have a future soccer player on our hands). Worse part so far - feeling like I was going to barf from the end of week 5 to the end of week 11 and waking up every 2 hours to pee. Trippiest part - feeling the baby move for the first time (tap tap...tap tap tap).

Truth be told, I think Scott and I are both still getting out heads around it. I mean, the whole thing is a lot to digest. Very exciting, but totally scary at the same time. Life as we know it is going to change in the very near future and we are suddenly going to be responsible for another human being. Goodness. I can just picture a little Scott Junior...can you imagine? I can barely handle him, let alone the toddler edition! Anyway, I'm sure I'll be posting a lot more on this subject, so bear with me through the next while. I've heard the second trimester is the best of the three, so we'll see if that is actually true!

In the blink of an eye.

I can't believe it's almost November. What happened to October? I feel like I blinked and it was gone. Or maybe it was that I was sick for at least half of it and I slept through it. Could be. Regardless, it's Halloween time and this year Scott and I are heading over to our friends Dave and Jen's place for a Quentin Taratino themed party. I'm not sure who Scott is going as (he said something about slicked back hair and a dark suit...that could be a few characters from a few movies). I am going as the Bride on her wedding day, pre-shoot up. Kind of a cop out I know, but hey, I get to wear my wedding veil again! I mean, besides to do the vacuuming.

In other news, Bossa continues to be a hateful little beast. She has figured out how to rush the baby gate at the top of our stairs (the one placed there so she would no longer have access to Samba, thereby removing daily opportunities to attempt to kill her). Bossa somehow managed to put all of her weight at the top of the gate, getting it to move out of place. She then hefts herself through the space between the gate and the banister. To stop her from doing this I bought a bungee type cord that I now hook through the top of the gate, around the banister and connect, making this impossible. I am willing to bet that before we see December she has either figured out another method of getting past the gate or my entire basement will be drenched in cat piss in retaliation. Anyone want a black, fur covered pie wagon?

Hot air enemas for all.

Every year around this time, two things happen:

1. The furnace kicks on, signifying that Fall is really upon us (three cheers for Fall!).
2. Bossa takes her rightful place on top of the floor vent, months of hot air enemas ahead for her enjoyment.

Scott took this picture of Bossa this morning. It is a good photo, because she is only sitting on the vent. Once she lays her mammoth self down, she covers the entire vent so you can't even see it. This leads to conversations like "in theory, it would have made sense for the builder to put a vent in this room, but I can't find one" or "didn't there used to be a vent in this room?". These words fall on deaf cat ears though as Bossa merely looks at you like "I know you love giving money to the gas company to keep me comfortable". Too bad the rest of the room remains freezing just so she can be a fur heating pad. Bossa, one day we will install a gas fireplace in the family room, just for you. And you can lay in front of it and roast your insides until they are crisp. A vision, really.

Samba is much more sensitive to the needs of others in the household. She simply huddles over the vent (picture the Little Match Girl warming her hands by the fire). It is very sweet, and I would post a picture if I had one but she is a bit harder to catch in action. One would think that we were heating our home at just above slightly above freezing, but no, I have the thermostat programmed at 21 degrees during the times we are home and 17 degrees when we are at work/asleep. Seems reasonable to me, but Bossa and Samba are giving me a guilt complex about the whole thing. I guess this is retribution for all the times I complained about the heat as a kid. If I could I'd tell both these cats to "put a sweater on for chrissake".

I'm getting old.

Apples. How you like 'em?

Last night as I braved the windy weather to do our weekly grocery shopping (solo, because Scott is sick with a cold) I noticed a young couple discussing apples in Dominion's mediocre-at-best produce section. At first, I was a little confused as they discussed the merits of the different apples (he did not care for McIntosh apples, which he deemed "only good for baking"). She did not care for Granny Smith ("too tart"). I forget what they settled on, but it struck me that grocery shopping as a couple was clearly new for them. I wondered why they didn't just buy a few of each apple so that they would both be happy, but they seemed focussed on finding a middle ground, an apple they could both live with. Probably not a bad way to be in the beginning of a relationship.

They seemed to be moving in the same basic direction as me through the grocery store. I was curious to see what would happen in the soda aisle (would she cave to his Coke demands, or get her own case of Diet Coke? Skim milk or 2%? Tuna and soup preferences? White or whole wheat? The list of potential conflicts is endless, and that doesn't even include the pharmacy aisle (2 ply vs. 3 ply anyone?). I remember when Scott and started living together, the only thing I would not allow in our home was Hamburger Helper. He attempted to debate me on it, and quickly realized it was futile. We tend to eat meals together, which we jointly prepare. He seemed to have a hard time with all the vegetables I included and protested at first. The vegetables stayed put and again, he eventually gave in. He even sings the praises of my mixed green salads (rated "the best in the world" according to him). I liked Kraft dinner, he liked Shake and Bake chicken. Both still make appearances on occasion (that's the compromise part). Still no Hamburger Helper, and he knows better than to eat straight from the pot a la his days in university residence.

I'm not sure what the point of this post was. I guess I just got sentimental thinking that October 24th marks 7 years together. We are both taking the day off to lounge and relax together. I'm not sure what the date will entail, but I'm sure we'll find something we'll both enjoy (meaning no zombie movies or chick flicks, no Sports bars or Thai restaurants).

Some things to be thankful for (and a few not so much).

I started writing this post as just some random thoughts and it ended up being kind of bitchy and negative (not really in the spirit of Thanksgiving). So, I decided to back up a bit and start with some nice, happy thoughts first, then I'll end with the other stuff (I figure it's good for a few laughs). Not a lot going on in the Fickle Feline household this weekend, though I am looking forward to going over to Scott's folks place for some turkey later today. Scott and I are (mostly "I") are going to bake and Apple Cake later today for the big event. I'll post a picture if we a) remember to take one and b) if it turns out photogenic in the least. Domestic Goddess always has these awesome pics on her blog and I have yet to figure out how she always gets her pics to look so good, I can actually smell and taste the subject.

So, things to be thankful for. Well, this past year has been a doozey, but here we are, a year older, wiser, still standing, and stronger for it. Health, check. Happy, check. Roof over head not leaking, check. Place to go to work on Monday, check. Bossa no longer attempting to kill Samba on a daily basis, check. Family situation good, check. Christmas shopping started, check (I'm not kidding, I have already bought a present and decorations). Friends doing well, check. Children of friends doing well, check. New friend getting through the year as best she can, check. See, a lot of good things.

Onto the cranky (and a bit of a non-sequitur)...
I was all ready to settle in for a kickass evening of Thursday night TV, but the show that gets me started was pre-empted for effing baseball. Baseball! Can you believe it? Glamorous hot young sexy things got bumped for a bunch of quasi-athletes in their pajamas running around a big field. Gimme a break. I am not happy. So, this killed my evening as I really had no good excuse to hang out and wait for ER to start at 10pm. So, instead, I taped ER and went to bed. Exciting. At least Football has the decency to keep to Sundays and Monday nights - that I can handle (also, Scott explains all the different plays to me and I am endlessly entertained watching him hike pillows, block the coffee table, and tackle the lazy boy - he is nothing if not passionate about his football). Between hockey being back and now baseball playoffs I feel like my cozy fall evenings are now falling prey to these stupid games. Note, I don't include basketball in my complaints because I like basketball. Fickle I know.

While I'm bitching, let me also complain about all of the nasty goddamn smokers who like to congregate with their little cancer sticks directly outside my office's entry way. Oh how I love to walk through your nasty ass smoke as I enter my place of work. I seriously can't wait until smoking in public ANYWHERE is completely outlawed, and then, the only way you will be able to smoke is to dig a hole in your backyard and go sit in it, cover yourself up with dirt and smoke to what is left of your clogged heart's content. Can't wait. Until then, have some fucking courtesy and step away from the doorway. Not everyone wants to inhale poison just to get into their office. Note to my friends who smoke: I like you, but I hate your cigarettes, so don't be all pissed off at me, just go smoke somewhere else.